


Skeleton Squatters and the Vampire

by Xenbonzacura



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: AUs and characters to be tagged as they're added, Alternate Universe (Dancetale), Alternate Universe (Swapfell), Alternate Universe (Underfell), Alternate Universe (Underswap), Alternate Universe - Vampire, Alternate Universe(Horrortale), And of the Vampire Kind, Female Reader, I can't Pick My Favorite Skeleton, Multi, Of the Reverse Harem Kind, Possible Eventual Smut, Prepare For Tropes, Rating May Change, Reader is a vampire, Reader-Insert, Reverse Harem, So Have Several, eventual polyamory, readerxeveryone, self indulgent
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-16
Updated: 2019-01-26
Packaged: 2019-07-12 22:51:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 34,098
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16004951
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Xenbonzacura/pseuds/Xenbonzacura
Summary: You're a vampire who's been living in the city for far too long, so you retreat back to your forest home, where you haven't been for five years. Only, when you get there, someone else is calling the place "home", as well.Oh yeah, Monsters were a thing, now, and they're quickly going to find out that you're not quite so human yourself.





	1. Going Home

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Skeleton Squatters and the Landlady](https://archiveofourown.org/works/9816140) by [Tyrant_Tortoise](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tyrant_Tortoise/pseuds/Tyrant_Tortoise). 
  * Inspired by [The Skeleton Games](https://archiveofourown.org/works/8700787) by [poetax](https://archiveofourown.org/users/poetax/pseuds/poetax). 



The starlight was just bright enough that you could see enough of the unlit dirt road to see, despite the slight night-blindness that your self-imposed city lifestyle has caused you to develop. You mentally cursed yourself, again, for the flat tire that left you walking to your forest home on foot. Why didn’t you have a spare?

Because you lacked general forethought as a skill, that’s why.

That was the main reason you currently found yourself walking down a long, dirt road towards a house you rarely used, but have considered your home ever since you originally had it built. Life in the city, playing at being human while enjoying the nightlife, has caused such instincts to grow dull.

You sigh in relief as you reach the heavy wooden door of your forest home, reaching into your purse for the keys. The resounding thunk of the lock opening sapped some of the tension from your shoulders as you pushed the door in. Crossing the threshold, you felt the tell-tale shimmer of magic that welcomed you back home and made you feel safe.

You don’t bother to flick on the light, wanting some quiet relief in the dark, as you hang your purse on the hook by the door. That’s where you spot what you think is a black leather jacket that you know for a fact wasn’t yours. Next to the door was five pairs of shoes in a disparity of sizes, two of which were boots that had heels you’d never be caught dead in.

Deciding that you would, in fact, turn on the light, just to see what was going on, you catch a groan of complaint, followed by some shuffling on the couch. What you saw next made you look downright lively.

It was a skull, peaking at you from the other side of the couch cushion. You and the skull stared at each other for a few moments before his? Their? eyes widened somehow in surprise.

“so, there a reason you’re visitin us in the middle of the night?” The skull asked, and it definitely sounded male. No, it wasn’t just a skull, as you circled around the couch, aware of those empty, yet expressive eye sockets following you, you realized that it was a whole skeleton, clad in an orange hoodie and a pair of khaki cargo shorts. The skeleton was watching you with a cautious, guarded expression. That’s right, monsters were a thing now. And they have been for a good six years after they returned to the surface.

“I’d hardly call it visiting if I own the house,” you say, and the skeleton practically bolts upright, sockets widening again.

“PAPY? WHY ARE THE LIGHTS ON?” a voice calls from upstairs, “DID YOU HAVE A NIGHTMARE?”

The skeleton chuckles nervously, sockets flicking to the stairs before landing back on you.

“nah, bro,” he calls back, “more like someone decided to visit in the middle of the night.”

You’re about to remind him that you’re not visiting when you hear footsteps on the staircase, which draws your attention. Another, smaller skeleton clad in bright blue, space-themed pajamas is walking down the stairs.

The skeleton stops when he spots you, eye(lights?) turning into large blue star shapes in his larger, rounder sockets.

“ARE YOU A HUMAN?” He asks when he spots you.

“Uh, hi,” you say dumbly, not answering the question that was asked, instead offering one of your own, “so, uh, five pairs of shoes? How many of you guys are there?”

“there’s enough of us, kid,” a third voice says, making you jump. You whirl around and see that a third skeleton, this one clad in only a pair of basketball shorts and a stained, white t-shirt, had somehow made his way behind you. You never even heard him move. “so, how’d you get in here?” He asks, white circles of light you guessed acted as his pupils directed at you.

“With the key I have in my purse,” you say, and he blinks up at you in surprise. How a skeleton can blink, you’ll never know. You can see the corners of his grin strain, making you think it must be a permanent feature, “how did you get in here?”

He chuckles at you turning his question back on him, though the sound is hollow. “the door was unlocked,” he says, “and the whole place looked abandoned, covered in cobwebs.”

“You don’t have to explain yourself,” you say, and he looks surprised again, “an unlocked door to a seemingly abandoned house? Sounds like an open invitation if I ever heard one,” you sigh. You were certain that you always locked the doors whenever you left somewhere.

“SANS!” A new voice demands, accompanied by feet stomping from somewhere on the ground floor. A fourth skeleton, this time with sharp fangs and a crack from one of his eye sockets, made his way over to where you, and the newly dubbed “sans”, the sneaky skeleton, from the way the newcomer was scowling at him, were standing, “NOT ONLY DO I HEAR VOICES AT THIS UNGODLY HOUR, BUT I HEAR A HUMAN INTRUDER SAY THAT THEY HAVE A KEY TO THIS HOUSE! YOU SAID NOTHING ABOUT US BEING SQUATTERS WHEN WE MOVED IN HERE!”

You’re about to say something about you owning the house, when you see that the icy blue eyelights of the scowling skeleton were newly trained on you. “AND YOU! IF YOU DIDN’T WANT SOMEONE MOVING IN AND CLAIMING YOUR HOUSE, YOU SHOULDN’T HAVE LEFT IT UNLOCKED AND ABANDONED FOR SO LONG!” The skeleton demands, pointing at you with a clawed finger. He was dressed in dark purple pajamas, you realized, the simple, soft kind.

“DOES SHE OWN OUR HOME, SANS?” a new voice asks. It’s as loud and boisterous as the stompier two of the smaller skeletons, but upon looking up, you see a similar body to the first you’d met, clad in white pajamas covered in a print that was just multiple plates of spaghetti. He’s nervously ringing his hands together as he looks between you and Sans.

“seems that way, bro,” Sans says, glancing at you. So they were brothers, just like the first two, then.

“Wait, you called this place your home?” You ask, looking up at the spaghetti-pajamad skeleton.

“WELL, MISS HUMAN, WE’VE LIVED HERE FOR FOUR YEARS, ALL OF US, TOGETHER,” he says, “SO, WE’VE KIND OF STARTED SEEING THIS PLACE AS HOME.”

They consider this their home? But you were able to cross the threshold just fine, without an invitation you were certain you wouldn’t have gotten.

“Isn’t that just the strangest thing?” You say mostly to yourself, “I’ve been away for five years, but this is still the only house I’ve ever considered my home.” That had to be it, you felt safe and at home here, in the depths of your own, dead soul, so you were still able to enter freely.

“so what do ya intend to do?” Asks another voice, quieter than the rest, coming from the stairs. This skeleton was small, very small, and dressed in what looked like a simple pair of soft black sweats in addition to another stained white t-shirt. Following behind him was another tall skeleton, though this one had a slender build opposed to the broader shoulders of the other two.

“a normal human would kick us out inta tha night,” another new voice says suddenly. You turn around to see yet another sneaky skeleton that managed to get behind you without you noticing. This one was another tall skeleton, though he had sharp fangs like the one he was standing behind, one of which was replaced with a gold false one, a crack leading from it on the left side of his face, up past his eye socket.

This latest newcomer was dressed in a pair of loose pajama pants and a black t-shirt, though he was also sporting a burnt orange dog collar with thick dulled spikes. It looked heavy-duty and durable. From what you could see of the latter fanged skeleton’s bones, where the t-shirt left his arms exposed, they were covered in scars.

“I REFUSE TO ALLOW THAT TO HAPPEN,” another, harsher voice declares from the hallway. This skeleton was another, tall fanged one, with three cracks over his left eye socket, crimson eye lights practically bored into you as he marched up to where you were standing. He was dressed in black silk pajamas.

Behind the tall, harsh looking skeleton was yet another one of the shorter skeletons, and this one also had sharp fangs, which were pulled down into a scowl. He also had glowing red eyelights that were trained on you, and yet another crack leading down from his left eye socket to a golden replacement tooth. He was dressed similarly to Sans, though his shirt was black, and he also sported a collar, though this one was dark red. As you took in his appearance, a thin sheen of what you could only assume was magic beaded up on his skull like sweat.

“NOW EDGE,” Sans’ brother piped up, “I’M SURE WE CAN COME TO SOME SORT OF AGREEMENT WITH THE HUMAN.”

“I’m certainly not in the habit of kicking people out of their homes,” you say, and the tall fanged skeleton, Edge, scoffs. You can tell he doesn’t believe you. You turn your attention back to Sans.

“Sans, right?” He nods, watching you cautiously, “is this all of you?” You motion to the skeletons in the room, ten in total.

“this is everyone that lives in the house,” he says, though his wording makes you believe there might be more elsewhere on the property. You put that bit of information away for later.

“I’m not about to be responsible for ten homeless monsters,” you say, and Sans makes a noise like he doesn’t know what you’re getting at. “I’m saying, let’s all get some rest for the rest of the night, then we can discuss what we’re going to do about this place tomorrow, alright? Though I can tell you right now, the odds are definitely in your favor for staying here.”

“why do you say that?” He asks, clearly confused.

“Because I know what it’s like to suddenly not have anywhere to go,” you say.

“UM, WELL, BEFORE THEN, WOULD YOU LIKE ME TO INTRODUCE YOU TO EVERYBODY?” Sans’ brother speaks up, drawing your attention back to him, “THAT WAY THERE, WE’RE LESS LIKE STRANGERS, AND IT SHOULD BE LESS AWKWARD SLEEPING UNDER THE SAME ROOF.”

“Go for it, big guy,” you say, and you guess that was the right thing to say, because his whole stance changes and suddenly, he’s oozing confidence.

“GLADLY, HUMAN!” He says, posing dramatically with a hand on his chest, “I AM THE GREAT PAPYRUS. YOU ALREADY KNOW SANS’ NAME. HE IS MY BROTHER.”

Papyrus motions over to the couch, where the first skeleton you encountered was laid back down, watching the exchange, his brother hovering nearby, watching you with those blue stars in his sockets, “THE ONE ON THE COUCH IS STRETCH,” Papyrus says, “HIS BROTHER THERE BY HIM IS BLUEBERRY.”

Papyrus then turns to the smallest of the skeletons and his slender brother, who were still hovering by the stairs, “THAT IS SERIF,” the small skeleton waved at you, “AND HIS BROTHER TANGO.”

“THE ONE WHO YELLED AT SANS IS BLACKBERRY,” Papyrus says, turning your attention to the sharper bunch of skeletons, “AND NEXT TO HIM IS HIS BROTHER, ER, MUTT.”

“Mutt?” You parrot, and the skeleton in question smirks slightly at you, the corner of his teeth pulling up slightly. It was the one in the orange collar. You thought so.

“’s what m’lord calls me,” he says, motioning to his brother.

“ANYWAY,” Papyrus starts up again, “LASTLY IS EDGE, AND HIS BROTHER, RED.” You turn your attention back to the last two skeletons. Edge, you knew, was the taller one, so that meant Red was the one currently sweating a nervous sheen of magic.

“Well, my name is Y/N,” you say, “it’s nice to meet you all. Just wish it had been under better circumstances than waking you up in the middle of the night.”

“WHAT WERE YOU DOING OUT IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT, ANYWAY?” Blue asks.

“Believe it or not? Getting out of the city,” you say, “I’ve never felt at home there, it’s just been more convenient.” You weren’t lying. Living in the city made it much easier to stay fed, though from here, you were close enough to easily slip into the city if you needed to.

“WHILE I DON’T TRUST YOU,” Blackberry starts up, “SINCE WE’LL BE DISCUSSING WHAT WE’RE GOING TO DO ABOUT THE HOUSE TOMORROW, I’M GOING BACK TO BED. MUTT! YOU’RE COMING TOO.” He stomps off back down the hall, where you guessed his bedroom was.

“coming, m’lord,” Mutt says. He glances your way for a moment, before following his brother.

“I’M GOING BACK TO BED, TOO,” Blue says, “GOODNIGHT, Y/N, I HOPE WE CAN BECOME FRIENDS.” Before you can say anything in response, Blue is already heading upstairs.

“IF IT’S ALL THE SAME,” Papyrus starts, “I SHOULD REALLY GET BACK TO BED, TOO.”

“I’m not stopping you, Papyrus,” you say, and he smiles down at you, before heading for the stairs himself.

“I’M GOING TO BED, AS WELL,” Edge says, “DO NOT FOLLOW ME, HUMAN.”

“Wasn’t planning on it, Edge Lord,” you say, and he stiffens, glaring at you momentarily, before practically marching back to where you think his room is.

“Hey, I have to ask,” You say, just as Serif is about to start heading up the stairs again, making him pause as he, and the other skeletons still in the room, turn back to face you, “is there a room that still has the black-out curtains? One that I can sleep in.”

“the fuck do ya need those fer?” Red asks. It’s the first time you’ve heard him speak up, and he has a fairly thick accent you can’t quite place.

“I have a pretty bad allergy to the sun,” you say, “that’s why they were up in the first place.”

“gonna have ta call bullshit on that, bud,” Red says, “never heard a such a thing.”

“Just because you’ve never heard of it,” you start, “doesn’t mean it’s not real. It’s something commonly referred to as vampire’s disease.”

“so ya burn up and stuff?” Stretch asks from his position still on the couch.

“Kinda,” you say, “it’s painful, for sure, and usually pretty instant.”

“i can’t think of an available room that still has them up,” Sans says, “would you be willing to sleep in the basement? then we can put some up in the dining room before you get up.”

“Actually, that would work,” you say.

“hold up,” Red starts, “only room available down there is that one with tha fuckin coffin. tha rest ‘re all full a boxes an shit.”

“The coffin will work,” you say, “I actually used to sleep in there.”

“yer shittin me?” Red asks, looking at you incredulously.

“if ya have all that sorted,” Serif starts, “i have ta go back ta bed.”

“SO DO I, ACTUALLY,” Tango says, “I HAVE WORK IN THE MORNING.”

“So go on, then,” you say, waving the brothers off, “you’re both adults, right? Do what you need to.”Serif looks at you stunned for a moment, before his brother pushes on him to go up the stairs.

“i think you’re the first human to not assume serif was a kid,” Stretch says when both brothers are up the stairs.

“What kid sleeps in sweats and a ratty old t-shirt? Especially when I know monsters can afford better,” You point out, and he just chuckles.

“suppose you’ve got a point,” he says.

“Anyway, I’m beat,” you say, stifling a yawn behind your hand. You really were, the day has been an especially draining one for you.

“alright, follow me, kid,” Sans says. He leads you down to the basement, past a few rooms, before opening up one of the doors. Pushed up against one wall was a stack of boxes, and pushed up against another was the decorative, cherry-stained wooden coffin.

“you really gonna sleep in that thing?” He asks as you head over to it and lift the lid.

“It’s cushioned,” you reason, “and besides, I wasn’t kidding about the fact that I used to sleep in it.”

“it’s just,” he starts, eyelights roaming over the wooden surface for a bit, “don’t you humans usually bury your dead in those things?”

“Yes, Sans,” you start, “this is, in fact, a wooden corpse box. But it’s a corpse box with a mattress in it built for sleeping, not burying.”

“whatever you say,” he says. He looks like he wants to say something else, but thinks better of it, “alright. g’night, then.”

“Hey,” You say as he turns to leave the room. He stops and looks back at you, “I meant what I said earlier, about not kicking you guys out.”

“let’s talk it over tomorrow,” he says.

“You got it, Sans,” you say. He closes the door behind him as he leaves the room for real this time.

Kicking your shoes off and shrugging out of your jacket, you set both down by the coffin, before climbing in. You pull the lid down and let the earthen smell and relaxing magic of soil from the town you were changed in lull you into a deep sleep.

Your dreamless sleep is interrupted by a pounding on the lid of your coffin. You almost let yourself drift off again when the knocking returns. With a groan, you push the lid up, to reveal the smiling face of Papyrus, who must’ve been assigned to wake you up.

“GOOD MORNING, Y/N,” he announces, “SANS TOLD ME ABOUT YOUR… UNFORTUNATE ALLERGY TO THE SUN, SO I’VE HUNG THE THICK CURTAINS IN THE DINING ROOM, AND THE HALLWAY LEADING TO THE DINING ROOM. AND THE LIVING ROOM, SINCE THEY’RE CONNECTED.” He holds out his hand to help you out of the coffin, and you take it, letting him pull you up to your feet.

“I MADE BREAKFAST FOR EVERYONE, AND THEN YOU AND MY BROTHER CAN DISCUSS WHATEVER IT WAS YOU WERE GOING TO DISCUSS ABOUT OUR HOME,” Papyrus says.

“I think I can manage a few bites,” you say, “but I don’t handle solid food very well.”

His expression seems to drop for a moment, before he looks thoughtfully at you.

“TRUTHFULLY, THEN IT’S PROBABLY BEST YOU CAME WHEN YOU DID, AND NOT BACK WHEN WE FIRST STARTED LIVING HERE,” he says.

“Why, was your food not good back then?” You ask, and his eye sockets somehow start shifting from side to side.

“WELL, IT WASN’T NOT, NOT GOOD,” he says, and you have to hold back a bark of laughter at his wording.

“So we’re in the triple negatives, huh?” You say, “alright. Let’s go upstairs.”

When you get to the dining room, you spot Sans and a half-asleep Stretch already seated at the kitchen table, with Blueberry setting down plates in front of each of them, each sporting a rather loaded omelet.

“Is it only the four of you?” You ask as you sit down.

“serif went with his brother to work,” Sans says, “black and edge are checking some stuff out around the house and took their brothers with them for extra hands.”

“PAPY TOLD ME YOU SLEPT IN THE COFFIN DOWNSTAIRS,” Blue asks, looking at you curiously, “IS THAT TRUE?”

“Sure is,” you say, poking at your offered omelet with your fork, “it was my bed before I moved to the city. It’s just a pain to move something like that with all the weird looks it earns you, so I didn’t.” You take a bit of your omelet, surprised that, not only was it delicious, but the food seemed to practically melt before it even got to your stomach, which wasn’t churning at the presence of solid food. There was nothing solid about your meal.

“first time eating monster food, kid?” Sans asks, chuckling when he sees your reaction.

“But hopefully not the last,” you say as you scarf down more of your breakfast, “normally, one or two bites in and it’d already be too much.”

“Y/N TOLD ME ABOUT HER UNFORTUNATE INABILITY TO EAT SOLID FOOD,” Papyrus says when his brother looks like he wants to say something else, “I’M GLAD TO SEE THAT IT DOESN’T EXTEND TO MONSTER FOOD, AS WELL.”

“WHY ARE THE CURTAINS DRAWN?” A voice you recognize as belonging to Blackberry demands from the entry, as the door closes not long after.

“IT’S BECAUSE Y/N HAS A RATHER UNFORTUNATE ALLERGY TO THE SUN,” Papyrus announces back.

“I HIGHLY DOUBT THAT,” Black says.

Before you can even feel the pit of dread in your gut, he’s already pulled the curtains open on the east-facing window, drenching you in sunlight. Everything next is a blur, as soon as you feel the searing pain, you scramble to get up and away from the burning sun, knocking the table over in your haste.

You make it to the sink and turn on the cold water, spraying yourself down with the pull-away faucet as it makes an awful sizzling sound. Soon enough, the burning stops, and you can relax and turn off the water, though, the sight that greats you when you turn around has another, very different form of dread settling in your soul.

Every eyelight is turned on you, except for Black’s, who’s pointedly avoiding your gaze as he closes the curtains again. Even Stretch is fully awake now, with a lap full of his breakfast, as he watches you in disbelief.

You don’t have to touch your fangs to know they’re extended, your instincts having kicked into overdrive after that perceived threat on your life, but you do so anyway out of nervous habit, before they retract back into their sheaths. Your eyes, you’re sure, are a glowing red, as you look from one skeleton to the next.

There’s too many to hypnotize and make forget.

Would that even work on monsters?

“so, uh, care to explain that,” Sans says, motioning in the general direction of the kitchen to show that he meant what you’d just done.

“I’d rather not,” you say, “but I don’t have much of a choice, do I?”

“what do you think?” He asks, and you sigh as you straighten up from your position hunched by the counter.

You walk over and pick up the heavy wooden table, easily correcting it before setting it back down. The next thing you do is correct the chair you’d been sitting in, turning it so that you’re now facing the skeletons.

If you still had a heartbeat, it’d be pounding in your chest as you took a steadying breath.

“I think it’s probably obvious,” you say, “but I’m not human. Not anymore. But I’m not quite a monster, either.”

You didn’t know how monsters would react to vampires. You weren’t even sure if they were supposed to know about the existence of vampires, but it’s far too late to go back now.


	2. The quick reveal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So, the monsters you've just met all now know your secret, but they're oddly calm about it?

“tha fuck do ya mean yer not human anymore?” Red asks, looking at you nervously. The red sheen of magic is back. He’s standing next to his brother, but this time, he’s clad in a thick looking black jacket. The hood was lined with yellow faux-fur.

You catch him tugging at his collar while you think of what exactly you were going to say.

“Exactly what it sounds like, Red,” you say, “I was born human. Now I’m not. Though, the myths humans have about my kind tend to be a bit more accurate than the myths about monsters.”

He looks at you confused, seeming to tighten his fingers more around the collar around his neck.

“Come on, think about it,” you prompt, “the sun “allergy”, sleeping in a coffin-“

“YOU SLEPT IN THE COFFIN?” Blackberry interrupts you, prompting you to glare at him. He returns your glare, before his brother stops him with a hand on his shoulder.

“yer a vampire,” Mutt says, holding up his phone, showing you the results of a quick google search.

“Yeah,” you say, “I am.”

“WHAT’S A VAMPIRE, Y/N?” Blueberry asks from where he and Papyrus had been working to clean up the mess you’d made in your haste to escape the sunlight.

“they’re undead blood suckers, blue,” Mutt says.

“Well, he’s not entirely wrong,” you say, “but whatever you looked up likely portrays vampires as either pure evil, or tragic beings. I can assure you, neither portrayal is entirely true.”

“so, why don’t you start us off with what is true,” Sans suggests. Somehow, he’d managed to sneak away during all the commotion to grab a light blue hoodie that made him seem bulkier than he’d looked the night before.

“Okay. So, obvious stuff. As you’ve already seen, I can’t tolerate sunlight,” you say.

“YOU NEARLY DESTROYED THE DINING ROOM PROVING THAT ONE,” Edge states, like it was your fault.

“Well, which would you rather,” you snap, glaring up at the edgey skeleton that definitely deserved his name, “would you rather have a small mess that can be cleaned up, or a pile of ash and potential fire hazard that used to be a person?” He looks like he’s about to say something else, but his jaw snaps shut with an audible click as he takes in what you’d said.

“so, it woulda killed ya,” Stretch states, and you nod.

“Yeah. If I hadn’t gotten out of the sunlight and doused the flames before they could do more damage than my body could repair, it would have killed me,” you say. “Let’s see, what else? Like Mutt said, I drink blood to stay alive.”

That one earns you a look of disgust from a few of the monsters, and one of confusion from Blueberry.

“WHY DO YOU DRINK BLOOD?” He asks.

“Because if I don’t, it’ll drive me mad, and then I’ll starve,” you say, “I’ve seen the end result before. I’m still a person, but a blood-starved vampire is anything but. It isn’t pretty.”

“okay, so what about the undead thing?” Stretch prompts, before motioning to himself, “we’ve been called that before, but we’re just monsters.”

“It’s because vampires are always born human,” you say, “when we’re changed, the curse, or disease, whatever you want to call it, ravages our bodies. In the end, our heart stops, and never starts back up again. We develop a near unbearable thirst for human blood. We don’t even need to breath. I do it to calm myself.”

“i take it there’s a reason you seemed so reluctant to tell us this,” Sans says. You can tell by the look on his face that he’s carefully considering everything you’d been saying.

“Because my kind relies on secrecy to stay alive,” you say, “normally, if a mortal finds out about a vampire, they’re put under hypnosis, and made to either forget what they’ve learned, or forget about the vampire in its entirety.”

“I KNEW IT!” Black announces, “YOU JUST WANT TO USE YOUR MIND CONTROL POWERS, DON’T YOU?” He’s pointing at you, with one hand on his hip.

“Under normal circumstances, Black?” You say, looking at the boisterous skeleton, “We wouldn’t even be having this discussion. If you were human, and there were less of you, I’d have made you forget about me ever coming here.”

“but you wouldn’t kill us?” Stretch asks.

“I don’t kill,” you state simply, “I don’t have to.”

“says here there’s a thing where ya have ta be invited in,” Mutt says, still clearly flicking through his google search.

“Yeah,” you say, “that’s one of the things humans got right. But,” you hold up your hand when he’s about to say something else, “if I’m entering a place I see as my home?” You motion to the house you’re in, “I don’t need an invitation.”

“so what’re you gonna do, now, y/n?” Stretch asks. He’s been watching you just as calmly as Sans since the conversation started.

“That depends on you guys,” you say, “I don’t plan on kicking you out of your home, and I should hope you’d be willing to extend me the same courtesy. But, there’s just a little issue.”

“and what’s that, kid?” Sans asks.

“You guys know what I am,” you say, “like I said, if you were human, and there were fewer of you, I’d be gone, and you wouldn’t remember me even being here.”

“we’re not human,” Sans says simply.

“I know,” you sigh, “look, I want to believe you guys won’t reveal my secret,” you say.

“hadn’t planned on it,” Sans says, and it’s your turn to look at him in surprise, “everyone here knows a thing or two about secrets,” he explains, “besides, who would we tell? we’re a bunch of skeletons living out in the woods.”

“MY BROTHER IS RIGHT, HUM… ER, VAMPIRE Y/N!” Papyrus says, “YOU HAVE THE WORD OF THE GREAT PAPYRUS, THE SECRET OF YOUR EXISTENCE WILL ONLY BE KNOWN BY THOSE WHO LIVE IN THIS HOUSE!”

“THAT STILL DOESN’T SOLVE THE ISSUE OF WHAT WE WERE GOING TO DO ABOUT THE HOUSE!” Edge is scowling at Papyrus.

“actually, i have an idea about that,” Sans says, and everyone turns their attention to him.

“So, let’s hear it,” you say.

“i’d been thinking about it last night,” he said, “thanks to some of your word choices. like, uh, knowing what it’s like to have nowhere to go. and now i know, you’re kind of a monster.”

“Not exactly, but go on,” you prompt.

“how would you feel about us rentin this place from you? officially,” he says, “it’s a win-win. you get to keep your house, we still have our home, and we’d actually be on the books, legitimately.”

“So… like a landlady?” You say.

“well, a live in landlady, to be exact,” Sans says, and you look at him in confusion.

"Just like that?”

“you want to trust that we won’t go spillin the beans, right?” He asks, his eyelights nervously darting to you briefly, “what better way to guarantee it?”

He had a point, you suppose. While you had certainly given these guys no reason to trust you, they’ve been oddly, calm about the vampire reveal. A quick glance around showed you that, yes, Red was still eyeing you nervously, Blackberry was trying to look tough in his black shirt and skinny jeans, and Edge was being oddly cold in his scrutiny of you.

And Mutt just winks at you when he catches your eyes on him.

“Alright, sounds good,” you say, turning your attention back to Sans. From the look he gives you, he clearly hadn’t expected you to agree so readily.

“SO NOW WE’RE GOING TO BE LIVING UNDER THE SAME ROOF AS A WOMAN WE DON’T EVEN KNOW?” Edge asks coolly, narrowing his eye sockets at you.

“Yes, ten men, one woman, Edge. Those are real scary numbers there, buddy. It’s almost like you outnumber me or something,” you deadpan. He looks at you stunned for a moment, his jaw working as if he’s about to say something, before clicking shut, when his brother bursts out in genuine laughter.

“shit, tha joke weren’t even that funny,” Red starts, “but yer reaction is priceless, boss.” Red has his arms around his middle, and you think you can hear his bones rattling from the force of his laughter.

“SHUT YOUR TRAP, WELP!” Edge says, turning on his still laughing brother, “AND YOU, VAMPIRE, I AM NOT YOUR BUDDY!” He storms off back towards his bedroom, and you watch with a slightly bemused expression.

“shit, sweetheart,” Red says between steadying breaths, trying to calm himself from the force of his laughter, “yer joke was fuckin awful, but it actually managed to shut him up.”

“So, I’m a sweetheart now, huh, Red?” You ask, and the skeleton who had previously only been nervous around you shoots a wink in your direction.

“if ya wanna be,” he says, before shaking his head and chuckling some more, “fuckin hell. he wasn’t expectin ya ta respond like that, i can tell ya right now.”

“Should I tone it down with him?” You ask.

“nah. if anything, he might try an see what other reactions he can get outta ya,” Red says.

“What, do people not usually respond to Edge with sarcasm and whit?” You ask, and Stretch chuckles.

“not people outside of us, usually,” the orange clad skeleton says. You’re slightly stunned by how quickly these guys seem to be warming up to you, now that they know they’re going to get to keep their home.

Maybe they just want you to be more willing to let them stay? You could see that.

“Anyway,” you say, “now that the edgelord has stormed off to who knows where, I have to ask, did any of you happen to see a sports car with a flat in the driveway while you were out there?”

“tha two-seater with tha tinted windows?” Red asks, and you nod.

"That’s the one. In my own brilliant foresight, I forgot to keep a spare tire,” you say, “I can give someone money to get one and change it for me, or to give me a lift to a tire store so I can change it myself tonight after the sun goes down.”

“MUTT!” Blackberry demands, and his brother turns his attention to him.

“yes, m’lord?”

“GO CHANGE HER TIRE,” Black demands, “AND MAKE IT QUICK.”

“you got it,” Mutt says. Before you know it, he’s disappeared in a cloud of orange smoke.

“That was…” you start, and Black turns his attention to you.

“I’M HAVING MY MUTT DO SOMETHING FOR YOU, SO YOU HAVE TO DO SOMETHING FOR ME,” he says, “YOU’RE NOT ALLOWED TO USE YOUR VAMPIRE MIND POWERS ON ME, EVER. GOT IT?”

“Uh, yeah, no mind powers, got it,” you reply, slightly dumbstruck at that particular exchange, even as Black’s eyelights start shifting side to side as he thinks something over.

“ALSO, YOU ARE NOT TO MENTION MY LACK OF JUDGEMENT WITH THE CURTAINS,” he says. Ah, so there’s his true motivation.

“I don’t know,” you start, and you can see his eyelights snap back to you, “that’s two things, Blackberry. I’d say you owe me another favor if you want me to both forego the mind powers, and forget about the curtain incident. That just happened not even twenty minutes ago, by the way.”

“BUT YOU ALREADY AGREED TO THE NO MIND POWERS THING!” Black claims.

“I did, yes,” you say, “so you’re going to have to do something else for me if you want me to forget about the curtains.”

“SO WHAT ELSE DO YOU WANT?” He actually looks, desperate to know.

“Help me move my stuff from my small apartment in the city to my room in the basement,” you say, “my car is tiny and I can only move at night, it would take me weeks.”

“THAT’S IT?” Black asks incredulously, “I PUT YOUR LIFE IN DANGER AND ALL YOU WANT IS HELP MOVING INTO THE BASEMENT?”

“Well, if you’re not up to it,” you start, and you can already see him rising to the bait.

“OF COURSE I’M UP TO IT, VAMPIRE,” He declares, “I AM THE MALEVOLENT BLACK! YOU’LL HAVE YOUR STUFF MOVED INTO THE BASEMENT BY THE END OF TONIGHT!”

“Then consider the curtain incident forgotten,” you say. His grin stretches on his face, and he looks so proud of himself.

“NOW, I HAVE TO GO TO WORK IN THE MEANTIME,” he says, “UNLIKE SOME PEOPLE IN THIS HOUSE, I REFUSE TO SIT AROUND DOING NOTHING ALL DAY.” When he walks back towards the front door, you finally notice that he was wearing the smaller pair of heeled boots, which made you wonder if Edge was wearing the other one.

When the door closes behind him, you turn your attention back to the other skeletons in the room. They’re all looking at you with mixed levels of amusement, curiosity and concern.

“What?” You ask.

“that was fuckin spooky, is what,” Red says, “sure ya didn’t manipulate tha little guy?”

“If I did, than it was with my words, only,” you say, “he’s the kind of guy who seeks validation, and he seems genuinely worried about powers that I admittedly, don’t even know if they actually work on monsters or not.”

“SO YOU MADE HIM THINK HE STRUCK SOME SORT OF DEAL?” Blueberry asks.

“Sure did, Blue. Didn’t even need to use any powers,” you say, “But let’s keep it between the six of us, alright?”

“sounds good, kiddo,” Sans says.

“So, what are the rest of you going to do?” You ask, looking between them.

“I AM ATTENDING CULINARY SCHOOL,” Papyrus says, “I ACTUALLY DON’T HAVE TO LEAVE FOR ANOTHER HOUR.”

“EDGE, BLACK AND I ARE PERSONAL TRAINERS,” Blue says, “WE HELP PEOPLE TRYING TO GET INTO BETTER SHAPE, MONSTER OR HUMAN. IT’S PERFECT FOR US SINCE NONE OF US LIKE SITTING AROUND.”

“And the rest of you?” You ask.

“i do it work,” Stretch says, “tango runs a dance studio, and his brother tags along with him, though i don’t think serif actually helps out much. or even dances. sans and red work in the sciences.”

“Seriously?” You ask, and Sans just shrugs like it’s no big deal.

“was the only thing i was really good at underground,” he says, “other than my hotdog stand. which i still run from time to time.”

“what about you, sweetheart?” Red asks.

“Well, I already have a pretty sizeable personal fortune,” you say, “but I take odd programing jobs here and there to keep my skills up. I’ve actually really loved working with computers since I got my first one way back when.”

You can’t help but notice they didn’t mention what Mutt did for a living. You decide not to press on it.

“Hey, I just had a thought,” you say, “the boxes in my room, were they my stuff?”

“uh, yeah. sorry about that, kiddo,” Sans says, and you just shrug.

“Nah, don’t worry about it,” you say, standing up out of your chair. You notice that Blue and Papyrus have already gotten the entire mess cleaned up from earlier.

You feel bad about that, it was your fault that breakfast got destroyed.

“I’m gonna go downstairs and see if there’s anything in those boxes I feel like unpacking,” you say, heading for the basement.

 

* * *

 

 

 There wasn’t much you wanted to keep in the boxes, some old clothes and blankets you figured could be put to better use elsewhere, so after spending a couple hours going through them, you haul the boxes up the stairs and into the living room.

“i thought ya were movin in, not out,” Stretch notes from his position on the couch when you drop one of the boxes.

“I am,” you say, “but I thought we could get rid of some of this stuff.” You pat the top of the box, and he sits up to get a slightly better look.

“what’s in there?” He asks, “if ya don’t mind.”

“This one’s clothes,” you say, “there’s a couple more in my room that are clothes, and two full of blankets. If there are any other boxes of my stuff, we can go through those at a later point and clear out the stuff none of us in the house wants. That should clear up some of the rooms downstairs, right?”

“sure ya wanna get rid of it?” He asks, arching a brow ridge.

“This place is my home, not some stuff I don’t need,” you say, “besides, you can only keep the same bunch of outfits for so many years before people start to think you’re fashion sense froze in place.”

“and ya want to prevent that?” Stretch asks.

“Something like that,” you say, “but anyway, do you know of a good thrift store or something I can give this stuff to? It’s better than just throwing it away.”

“actually, yeah, i do,” Stretch says, “redid the systems for one on the edge of the city about a month or so ago. if you put those boxes in the bed of my pickup, i can take it there tomorrow when they’re open.”

“You have a truck?” You ask.

“yup. it’s in the garage. door should be shut for you,” he says.

“Alright. Thanks, Stretch,” you say. You pick the box back up and start heading for the door that leads out to the garage. You hear a quick ‘no problem’ from the monster behind you as you open the door. Sure enough, one of the vehicles in the garage was a large, gold colored pickup that you felt was somehow a surprising fit for the lounging monster.

Not that you really had a point of reference for that sort of thing. Not when you just met the guy.

You spend the next hour or so filling the truck bed with boxes, only to hear the garage door opening as you’re, thankfully, closing the door to the house proper behind you. You head back to the living room, where you’re about to ask Stretch what kind of show he’s watching, you could hear the music from the television while you were moving the boxes, when you hear the door open back up again.

“OH, MY, WHY ARE ALL THE CURTAINS DRAWN?” Tango asks when he steps into the room, looking around.

“For my health,” you respond, “sorry about that.”

“YOUR HEALTH? OH, YOU MEAN THESE ARE THE BLACKOUT CURTAINS YOU ASKED ABOUT LAST NIGHT, THEN,” Tango says as his brother enters in the room behind him. You can see Serif watching you from under the hood of his indigo pullover, hands both shoved in his pockets as he moves.

“Sure are, Tango,” you say.

“OH! YOU REMEMBERED MY NAME, HUMAN! HOW WONDERFUL, GIVEN WE WERE INTRODUCED ONCE,” Tango says.

“That’s right, you weren’t here this morning after I woke up,” you say, earning a confused look from the skeleton.

“WHAT HAPPENED AFTER YOU WOKE UP WHILE MY BROTHER AND I WERE GONE?” he asks. You look up at him, remembering how Papyrus said that only the people who lived in this house would know your secret. Serif and Tango live in this house. You had to tell them, it was only fair.

“Can I sit here?” You ask, motioning to the couch. Stretch nods, moving his feet out of the way and adjusting himself so he’s sitting up better, letting you sit down. “Thanks,” you say as you do, before motioning for Serif and Tango to sit in the other chairs, which they do, Tango settling in an armchair, and Serif taking a dining room chair that he pulled in out of nowhere.

“So, you see how the curtains are drawn, and you know how I told you about my allergy to the sun last night?” You ask, and the two skeletons nod, Serif motioning for you to continue. “Well, there’s more to it than that.”

“WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY THAT, HUMAN?” Tango asks.

“That, the human thing,” you say, “I’m not a human. I’m actually something I’m sure humans have referred to you both as in the past.”

“A MONSTER?” Tango says, “BUT EVERYONE CALLS US MONSTERS, NOT JUST HUMANS. THAT’S WHAT WE ARE.”

“she means tha undead,” Serif says, “right?”

“Exactly,” you say, “more specifically, a vampire.”

“gonna have ta call bullshit on that one,” Serif says, parroting what Red said the night before about the curtains.

“wouldn’t believe it myself if i hadn’t seen proof of it,” Stretch says, and the two brothers look over at him in surprise.

“WHAT SORT OF PROOF, STRETCH?” Tango asks.

“nearly burnin up in the sunlight when black opened the curtains, for one,” he says, “not to mention her speed in getting out of the sunlight, or the fangs and red eyes when she looked back at all of us.”

“fangs?” Serif asks.

“Not as out there and in your face as Edge’s or Black’s or their brothers’ fangs,” you say, “but here, I’ll show you.” You use one finger to push your upper lip out of the way slightly, baring your teeth, before extending your fangs as they both lean in to look.

“that…” Serif blinks at your mouth for a bit, before you retract your fangs and let your lip drop back into place, moving your hand to your lap, “ya have retractable fangs,” he says.

“All the better to fit in with humans with,” you say, “not that I need to fit in with humans anymore, for the most part, since I’m moving in with you guys.”

“wait, seriously?” Serif asks, “just like that?”

“Yup,” you say, “still need to draw up the official contract with Sans, but I’ll be something of a live-in landlady from now on, my room’s the one downstairs with the coffin. You guys are official tenants now, on the books, or, lease, rather, and I get to keep my home. Win-win.”

“and the vampire thing?” Serif motions at you.

“Stays in the house,” you say, “everyone else found out over the disaster that had been breakfast, then I told you two so it would stay fair. Nobody else is to know, or to know that you know. I’m dead serious about that one.”

“SO, DOES THAT MEAN WE HAVE TO START GETTING UP AT NIGHT SO WE DON’T HAVE TO KEEP THE CURTAINS DRAWN, THEN?” Tango asks, looking over at the covered window. That’s right, these guys probably grew up underground, assuming they weren’t ancient monsters who were trapped way back when.

“I’ve been thinking about that while going through old boxes of my stuff,” you say, “it was something that had never crossed my mind back in the day since I was only ever up at night, but there are windows that have a special UV protection,” you say, “had them in my apartment in the city. Was able to walk around, curtains open, in broad daylight with no issue. I could pay to have them installed in every room in the house that has windows.”

“SO WE’D STILL GET TO ENJOY THE SUN FROM OUR OWN HOME?” Tango asks.

“Sure would,” you say, “Black’s gonna help me move my stuff in tonight, so I’ll work on that before bed.”

“SO, WE GET TO KEEP OUR HOME, YOU GET TO KEEP YOUR HOME, WE GET A NEW FRIEND, AND WE GET TO KEEP SEEING THE SUN,” Tango says, tapping the side of his jaw, “THAT ALL SOUNDS GREAT!”

“Friend?” You ask, looking up at him.

“WELL, YOU ARE GOING TO BE LIVING HERE NOW,” Tango says, “YOU SAID SO YOURSELF. EVERYONE ELSE WHO LIVES HERE ARE FRIENDS, SO IT STANDS TO REASON YOU SHOULD FIT INTO THAT CATEGORY, TOO.”

“You know, Tango,” you start, “that, actually sounds good.”

It’s been so long since you’ve had anyone you could actually call a friend. Let alone anyone you wanted to. Maybe these skeletons are going to be good for you, after all. You’re aware of the fact that Stretch is still relaxed next to you on the couch, his body not stiffening up at the thought.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you guys have ideas for chapters, questions for any of the skeletons here, want some headcanons and imagines, or are at all interested in Undertale related rps, come follow me on tumblr [Splintertale-stories](https://splintertale-stories.tumblr.com/)
> 
> asks and submissions are always open, and don't have to be about SSV, NSFW will always be under a cut and tagged


	3. Movie Night... Start?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Black and Mutt help you move your stuff from your old apartment without an issue, and Stretch invites you to movie night with him, Red and Serif
> 
> That's a good step... right?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, this chapter took me disproportionately long to write, Serif was actively fighting me...
> 
> So I decided to just go with what he seemed to want to do

“ashtray told me ya were goin through yer old boxes an getting rid a shit,” Red says from behind you.

You turn around to face the skeleton from where you were currently going through yet another box, this one full of old books that you were actually pretty keen on keeping around, as you set the leather-clad tome you’d been holding down on the floor. Many of these were older than you.

“Yeah, I was,” you say, “and who do you mean by ashtray?”

“eh? stretch, sweetheart,” Red jabs his thumb behind him to point back upstairs, “anyway, why tha hell ya getting rid a yer shit? just don seem right.”

“I’m only getting rid of things I don’t need, Red,” you say, standing up and dusting off your pants, “anyway, you can’t have come down here just to question me about that. What’s up?”

“sun’s down,” Red says, “an black’s out front with a fuckin u-haul demandin ya get yer ass up there so ya can get yer stuff.”

“Alright, thanks, Red,” you say, “oh, before I go get my stuff, did Tango tell you my idea for the windows?”

“no, what about em?” He asks, looking at you confused.

“I was thinking we could have them replaced so you guys didn’t have to live in the dark just because I’m here, now,”you say.

You could tell he didn’t know how to respond to that, but he wasn’t tugging at his collar, so you took that as a good sign. He follows you back upstairs and, the curtains were indeed pulled open to reveal that the sun was in fact down, and there was a U-Haul pulled out front and illuminated by the porch light.

Mutt stops you on your way to the front door, dangling what you quickly realize to be your car keys in front of you.

“yer drivin yer car,” he says, “m’lord an i will be following in the movin van.”

“Black doesn’t trust me to share the cab of a truck with him?” You ask, taking your keys from the skeleton as you look up at his face. He arches a brow ridge at you, and his teeth pull up into the same smirk you’ve seen both other times you’d seen him before.

“not that he don trust ya, y/n,” he says, “but tha truck’s a two-seater. unless ya got a fantasy about bein caught between two brothers.”

“Your flirting could use some work,” you say, and he just chuckles, “most guys who flirt with me don’t usually skip to insinuating threesomes with their brothers. Especially not the ones that actually have brothers.”

He doesn’t say anything in response to that, just following behind you as you head towards the door, picking up your purse from the hook on your way past. Once outside, you spot Mutt getting into the driver’s side door, before noticing Blackberry through the windshield. He looked impatient, and even a little bored as he stared out into the woods.

You take mercy on him by getting into your car quickly. This time, as you drive down the dirt driveway, there’s nothing to cause a flat tire, and you make it onto the highway easy enough, and it’s just a short drive to the city from there.

Your apartment was in a strictly human occupied part of the city, monsters occupying another area entirely, and that was simply due to the convenience of it. A convenience you were all to glad to give up at this point.

After you tell the brothers which apartment is yours, you take care of things with your landlord before helping them out. It doesn’t take long to get your stuff all packed, mostly just leaving behind the bed you’d been using and the small kitchen table that never got used for much other than space for crafty projects you did whenever you got bored.

You figure the sofa can be used to divide your room.

Back at the house, the three of you quickly get all your stuff moved down to your room, though you figure it’d take a good day, at least, before you can get it all put away.

You’re contemplating what you’re going to do about organization, when you hear a knock at the door.

“hun, if ya got time, wanna come up and watch some movies with us?” Stretch calls when you don’t immediately answer.

Hun, huh? Seems Stretch is just as fond of pet names as Red.

“Who is us, and where did Hun come from?” You ask, opening the door. Stretch is standing there, slightly hunched in a relaxed posture, in the same orange hoodie and cargo shorts combo he’s been wearing, other than the fact that this one didn’t have stains from breakfast on it. You can see the stick from a sucker between his teeth that he seems to be chewing on as he looks you over just as you are him.

“us is me an red. maybe serif,” he says, “and what, ya don’t like pet names, honey? you didn’t seem to mind it from red.”

“I just wasn’t expecting it, is all,” you say, “it’s kinda sweet.”

“sure is,” the corners of his mouth pull up in a grin at your pun.

“You know, a movie night actually sounds pretty good,” you say, stepping completely out of your room to follow him up the stairs. Unpacking can wait.

“alright, y/n’s in,” Stretch says when he gets to the living room. He flops back down on the couch, and you hear the sound of popcorn popping from the kitchen.

“What kind of movie were we going to be watching?” You ask.

“figure that out when we’re lookin, sweetheart,” Red says. He’s stepping out of the kitchen with a bowl of popcorn in one hand, and followed by Serif, who seems to have collected drinks.

“Is this make the vampire jealous night?” You ask, pointing at the snacks, and Red just chuckles, shaking his head.

“nah. popcorn’s human food, sure, but tha drinks ‘re monster cola,” Red sets the bowl down on the coffee table, before scowling slightly at the couch, “here, ya sit down next ta ashtray, an i’ll sit on yer other side. then ballerina here can sit in yer lap, fuckin small ass couch.”

“Wait, what?” You ask, looking at Red, before letting out a squeak when Stretch pulls you down to sit next to him. You notice Serif’s turned a fairly bright blue, his hood pulled up to hide his skull, “hang on, there’s armchairs. Can’t we pull one of them over?”

“don’t worry about it, hun,” Stretch says, “serif’s just embarrassed because he realized he’s actually small enough to sit on your lap without causing an issue.” He chuckles as his words seem to make the smallest of your new housemates blush an even brighter blue.

“i can just pull a chair over,” Serif says, his eyelights darting over to the nearest armchair. Even with it pulled over, it kind of ruins the magic of your impromptu movie night with your new housemates, you decide.

“Serif, it’s alright, get over here,” you say, motioning for him to walk over to the couch, “you guys invited me to join in on movie night, we’re doing this right.”

Serif looks at you with confliction written plain on his face as his eyelights dart between you and the chair. Eventually, he relents and walks forward towards you, stopping just at the side of the coffee table. You shift back in the couch, Stretch moving slightly to accommodate you, when Red flops down on the couch next to you.

“I’m not gonna force it, Serif, but half the fun of a movie night is being piled on top of each other on the couch under the same blanket while you watch the movie, right?” You motion to the blanket on the back of the couch, patting it slightly, while Serif’s eyelights seem to dart from you, to Red, to Stretch and back.

“okay,” he says finally.

“Alright. Hang on, I have an idea,” you say, folding one of your legs under the other. You turn slightly so that you’re leaned against Stretch, with your legs pressed up against Red’s. Serif makes a startled noise when you grab him and pull him up to your lap, but before he can protest too much, Stretch has somehow draped the blanket over the four of you.

“bout time, twinkletoes, fuck,” Red says, “makin this shit more awkward than it’s gotta be.”

Serif mumbles something, but before you think to ask what he said, you see the remote flying towards Red with a slight red glow to it.

“How are you doing that?” you ask, pointing at the remote, and Red just smirks at you.

“magic, sweetheart,” he says, “magic can be used ta do a bunch a things.”

“now that we’ve got the seating arrangements figured out,” Stretch says from behind you, “shouldn’t we get the movie picked out.”

“yeah, yeah, i’m on it,” Red mumbles. He turns on the TV, switching it over to Netflix. He quickly flips through a selection of movies, “what ya wanna see, sweetheart?” He pauses over a selection of horror movies, looking over at you.

“Well, what do you guys usually watch?” You ask, and he shrugs.

“little a this, little a that,” he says, “last time, stretch’s bro had us watchin some saccharine shit with singin animals.”

“Sounds like a Disney movie,” you say, “hang on, Red, give me the remote, I’ll pick us a classic.”

It doesn’t take you long to find what you’re looking for, the iconic cover art showing Bella Lugosi holding an unconscious looking Helen Chandler by her neck announcing your pick, the title “Dracula” clearly on display.

“tha fuck is this shit?” Red asks, and you think you can see his eyelights scanning the movie synopsis.

“A vampire movie,” you say, as if it should be the most obvious thing in the world, “a classic vampire movie, to be exact. Count Dracula there made vampires a viable movie monster, and solidified what humans think of us for a while.”

“and ya wanna watch it?” Serif asks, turning a bit so he can look at you.

“Why not?” You shrug, “not the first time I’ve seen it. Besides, there’s media out there that portrays vampires in a much worse light. Some of them get downright gory, and some make vampires and demons interchangeable.”

“aight, if that’s yer pick,” Red says with a shrug.

The four of you settle in to watch the movie, and every now and then, you catch Red or Serif glancing your way. You’re pretty sure Stretch is, as well, but you can’t be too sure, since you can’t see the lanky skeleton from the angle you’re sitting.

Things are going fine though, until you catch Serif watching you far too warily for your liking. He even seems to be considering leaving the living room, if his nervous glances towards the stairs tell you anything. You grab the remote from where it had been set on the back of the couch, earning a grumble from Red, and a curious noise from Stretch.

“Okay dude, what’s up?” You ask Serif, who seems caught off guard.

“ya said ya were the same species as tha guy in tha movie, right?” He asks, glancing towards the paused movie.

“I am,” you say, “but that’s just a movie. It’s not accurate, if that’s what you’re worried about.”

“how do we know?” He asks, and you can feel three pairs of eyelights on you, not just the one.

“Not one to just take my word for it, huh?” You ask, and he averts his eyes, “truth told, I don’t know if I would either, Serif. You just met me last night, found out I wasn’t human, and now I’m saying “trust me, I won’t hurt you”. I get it, I really do.”

“i... need some air,” Serif says, tossing the blanket to the side and getting up off the couch, “sorry i ruined movie night.” He walks off towards the front door, leaving you to stare after him, confused.

“Is… is he going to be alright?” You ask, looking between Stretch and Red.

“he will be, honey,” Stretch says, turning back from where he was watching Serif leave to look at you again, “gotta understand. we’re not really a very trusting bunch, but red and i wanted to give you the benefit of the doubt, since you’ve technically never lied to us. we were trying to get serif to do the same.”

“Hang on…” You trail off, looking between the two of them.

“he means, ya never once outright said ya were human,” Red says, “ya jus never corrected anyone who said ya were until black pulled tha stunt with tha curtains.”

“That’s still a lie of omission, Red,” you say, and he just shrugs.

“semantics, sweetheart,” he says, before getting up off the couch, “i’m gonna go find twinkletoes an make sure he don do anythin stupid.”

With that, he leaves you alone with Stretch. You scoot off to the side, giving the lanky skeleton more room, and he quickly props his feet up on the couch when you do so.

“Is that alright?” You ask, looking over at Stretch again.

“they’ll be fine, hun,” he says, “like i said, red and i are givin you the benefit of the doubt. serif will come around, eventually. in the meantime, might be hard for you to arrange anything solo with tango for a while.”

“Why’s that?” you ask, and his lazy grin quirks up for a moment, before settling back down.

“because serif’s actually the older bro,” he says, “yeah, tango’s an adult, but just like my own bro, serif can get over protective at times. difference is, i think blue already wants to trust you. anyway, think we can officially say movie night’s a bust.”

“That’s what I get for trying to put on a classic for you guys,” you say with a sigh, “maybe next time I’ll just put on a movie about aliens, or something. Or Disney. Disney is always safe.”

Stretch chuckles as you stand up. “maybe,” he says, “going to bed, hun?”

“Yeah. Sorry I’m not staying to hang out more,” you say, and he just waves you off.

“don’t worry about it. i’ll still be here in the morning,” he says.

“Why do I get the feeling that means you’ll be sleeping on the couch?” You ask, and he just chuckles as you walk towards the basement.

All things considered, you think to yourself, things could be worse. Red and Stretch are giving you a chance, and Serif at least tried. Maybe you will be able to pull off living in a house full of monsters, who knows?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you guys have ideas for chapters, questions for any of the skeletons here, want some headcanons and imagines, or are at all interested in Undertale related rps, come follow me on tumblr [Splintertale-Stories](https://splintertale-stories.tumblr.com/)
> 
> asks and submissions are always open, and don't have to be about SSV, NSFW will always be under a cut and tagged


	4. The scarred Stranger

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Your thirst is starting to make your instincts kick in around your new skeletal housemates, highlighting their flowing lines of magic, so you do the only logical thing. You go hunting.
> 
> And you meet someone new while you're out. Another skeleton.

Getting your room, and the basement in general, organized, went relatively quickly. It only took you a few days, really. Papyrus and Blue were more than willing to help you organize while they were home, and soon, not only did you get rid of all your outdated clothes, but you got not only your own room, but several other rooms in the basement, including a library and a game room. Blue and even Black both seemed really excited about that last one.

The library makes you wonder. Some of those books were downright ancient, there has to be something on monsters in them. Maybe there’s written documentation on whether your abilities would be useable on monsters. You grab one of the older books, which you’d put towards the back of the room, and curl up in a beanbag chair near the door.

That’s where Sans finds you. You hear a knock at the library door before he pokes his head in, clearly looking for you.

“uh, hey, kid, was wondering where you were,” he says, “didn’t really take you for much of a bookworm, to be honest.”

“Just doing some research,” you say, marking your page and setting the book aside to look up at him, “what’s up?”

“wanted to let you know that i went ahead and ordered the windows,” he says, “your uh, your computer wasn’t set up yet.” His eyelights flick over to your computer which was set up at a desk in the library, next to a table you had set out to stack books on.

“You didn’t have to do that,” you say, “I was more than willing to order them myself. I mean, dude, it’s my house,” you say, and he gives you a slightly nervous glance, “did you already pay for them?”

“uh, yeah? i mean, that’s par for the course when you order something over the internet, right?” He says, looking at you like he doesn’t quite know where you’re going with this.

“How much did you spend? Let me pay you back,” you say, moving to get up off your beanbag, and he blinks at you in surprise, before holding up his hand to stop you.

“there’s no need for that, kid,” he says, “we all live here, i don’t mind spending some of my own money so pap and the others can look out the window during daylight.”

“Not you, Sans?” You ask, and he chuckles slightly.

“more a fan of the stars, myself,” he says.

“I hear you,” you say, “and this has the best view of the stars in the area, short of climbing Mt. Ebott itself. Which I don’t recommend. There’s all kinds of sink holes when you get up past the marked trails.”

“so i’ve heard,” sans says, “not that i have any plans on finding out for myself.”

“So, hey,” you start, and he looks at you again, “you can’t have just come down here to tell me about the windows. What’s really up?”

“stretch told me what happened the other day with serif,” Sans says, and you sigh, flopping back on the beanbag.

“I really don’t blame him, Sans,” you say, “trust takes time. It would even if I wasn’t a vampire. I’m honestly surprised he was willing to give me a chance so soon.”

“you say that like you expected us to never trust you,” he says.

“Honestly? Knowing what I am? I’m still surprised you came up with the live in landlady idea,” you say, “that’s an open invitation to come and go as I please, even with the fact that I see this place as my home, it’s still a big gesture.”

“a show of trust for a show of trust,” Sans says, “you have to trust that nobody in this house will reveal your secret to anybody, and we have to trust that you won’t hurt us.”

“I already said I wouldn’t,” you say.

“i know you did, pal,” Sans says, “so you’re really not upset about what happened with serif?”

“No,” you say, shaking your head, “like I said, I get it. He’ll come around, if he wants to. I’m not gonna force it.”

“what were you watching, anyway?” He asks.

“A vampire movie,” you say, “Dracula, to be specific.”

He just chuckles at that, leaving the room, and leaving you to your research. You get back to it, but after a few hours, you’ve still yet to find anything regarding monsters in the book you’d been carefully looking through, and you decide to set it down on the table next to your desk, to be put away later.

You feel an uncomfortable dryness in your throat, moving your hand to rub over it. It’s been nearly a week since you’ve had a drink, and the mess with the curtains hit you harder than you’d like to admit.

Leaving the library, you head upstairs. Making it to the living room, you spot Stretch and Red on the couch, watching something on the television, though the volume is turned down low, and they’re passing commentary back and forth. The curtains are pulled wide open, revealing the night sky and darkened forest.

“goin somewhere, sweetheart?” Red asks when you walk past the couch to the front door.

“Yeah, I’m heading to the city,” you say, “I need a drink.”

“yer goin to a bar?” Red asks, “i know a good one, if ya need.”

“Not that kind of drink, Red,” you say.

“so you’re goin hunting?” Stretch asks, and you can see Red begin to sweat.

“Something like that,” you say. You grab your purse off its hook, and you feel someone grab your arm. Turning around slightly, you see Red’s the one holding onto you. He’s looking up at you, slightly nervously.

“ya sure ya shouldn’t wait till tomorrow? it’s kinda late,” Red says, eyelights flicking to the window, “don want ya caught out at sunrise.”

You almost consider it, your eyes easily finding the clock showing that it was three in the morning, leaving you with only a few hours to get into the city, find someone you can drink from, make sure they get home safely and then get home yourself.

Just as you’re about to say so however, the pain in your throat comes back, and your instincts kick into hunting mode. You’re made hyper aware of the magic running through the bones of the two monsters in the room with you, as well as the presence of the other eight monsters in the house, be they moving or stationary.

You feel your fangs extend as you focus your eyes at the base of Red’s neck, where you faintly see a line of flowing magic in a denser concentration than the rest of his body.

Just like a human’s bloodstream.

“I’m sorry, Red,” you say, “I have to go tonight. If I’m not back before dawn I’ll find somewhere I can stay for the day and come home tomorrow night.”

You gently pull his hand off your sleeve, and he must see something in your expression, because he doesn’t put up much of a fight when you do so, simply wishing you good luck when you leave the house.

 

 

Hunting, for you is as simple as keeping to the dark alleyways or parks of the city, and it doesn’t take you long to find a drunk man stumbling home alone, laughing at some random joke in his own head.

You almost feel guilty.

Stepping out in front of him, you subtly influence him to follow you into the alley with the potential of getting laid stuck in his head. He looks you over with a sleazy grin that makes you shutter as he pins you to the alley wall.

“Yer a real pretty girl, ya know that?” He asks, moving a hand to grope you through your shirt. You shutter again, and he seems to mistake it for a good thing, if the way his grin grows. You really know how to pick them.

His hand moves down lower, to grip your ass, and you’re about to just pull him down so you can get your fangs into his neck, when a voice at the mouth of the alley interrupts the two of you.

“what do ya think you’re doin?” The voice asks, and your target’s head snaps to look almost comically quickly.

“Go get yer own slut, freak,” he slurs out. Freak, huh? That catches your interest.

You turn to look at the newcomer as best you can from where you’re still pinned to the wall. Sure enough, the newcomer was a monster. Yet another skeleton monster, from what you can see of him, his white bones reflecting the dim light from the nearby light.

You can’t make out much of his face from where you are, but you only see a single golden eyelight glowing as he focuses on you.

“I said get lost, you fuckin freak,” the drunkard says. He pushes you off the wall, seemingly deciding something else is more important that the potential of getting laid. That something, you realize, is attacking the monster, as he pulls a knife you hadn’t even realized he had on him from somewhere on his person, the metal glinting in the light.

“woah, easy pal, i don’t want a fight,” the skeleton says, holding up his hands in a placating manner, and you can clearly see a hole through each of his palms.

“Too bad fer you, I don’t really care then,” the drunken sleaze says, “I don’t really care much for your kind.”

He goes to lunge at the monster, prompting you to do the one thing you could think of. You grab his wrist and force him to circle around, hitting him with your influence as soon as you make eye contact. Soon enough, he’s down, slumped in your arms, which just leaves you with one problem. Make that two problems.

The skeleton still standing in the alley, and your need to feed.

“friend of yours?” He asks, motioning to the man slumped in your arms.

“Hardly,” you say.

“so why don’t ya just drop him in this alley,” he says, “i can help ya get home, before i go to my own home.”

Hold on a minute.

“You wouldn’t happen to be talking about a house full of skeletons in the woods, would you?” You ask.

“how did you,” he starts, “wait, how do you even know about the place?”

“I own it,” you say, “I’m your live-in landlady, now. You can ask Sans to confirm, if you need to.”

A groan from your arms reminds you of pressing, throat burning matters.

“Wait, before you confirm anything with Sans, there’s something we all agreed that only those who live in the house are supposed to know. About me,” you say as you see him walking towards you. He’d pulled out a phone, the light from which is illuminating his face, giving you a good view of the cracks. One from his right eye socket, which was devoid of light, up to the back of his skull, and another connecting his left eyesocket and the corner of his mouth.

He appears to be typing on his phone, likely texting Sans, you guess. Shouldn’t he be asleep?

“sans confirms your story. y/n, huh?” He says, “so, why don’t you ditch that guy and we can get you home, you can tell me whatever it is when your there, not that ya need to.”

“It involves him,” you say, and he arches a browridge.

“i thought it was only supposed to be known by those living in the house,” He says.

“He’s not going to learn it,” you say, “he’s going to forget that this encounter ever happened.”

“not sure i get what you’re getting at, kid,” the new skeleton says.

“The fact that there’s no point in lying to you, or anyone who lives in the house,” you say. You will the man in your arms to stand, “look, I’ll answer any and all of your questions later, but for now, a minute of privacy would be nice.”

He gives you a disbelieving, almost grossed-out look.

“you’re not gonna,” he makes a vague gesture, and you easily figure out what he’s implying.

“What? No, fuck no!” You say, “I’m going to bite him.”

“bite?” He questions. You sigh, knowing he likely won’t leave without a straight answer, but the longer you sit there talking, the more your throat is beginning to burn, your instincts hyper focused on the human in front of you.

Despite him still standing there, you can’t delay any longer if you want sleaze to survive, and unfortunately, you do. You grab him by the front of his shirt and pull him close. You can smell the booze on his breath.

Your fangs, which have remained extended through the entire hunt and conversation, easily plunge into his neck. Your eyes flick up to the skeleton as you drink, and you can see him staring at you, a mild mix of disbelief and slight horror crossing his face, even as you retract your fangs and lick the wound closed.

The drunken anemic starts wondering off, in the direction you assume he lives. His steps are shambling, but all things considered, he’s fairly steady on his feet.

“what the fuck was that?” The mystery skeleton asks.

“My secret,” you say, “I’m a vampire. Someone who needs to drink human blood to survive.”

“so, what happens know that i’ve seen, whatever that was?” He asks.

“We keep it a secret, is what,” you say, “everyone else in the house already knows.”

“and they trust you?” He asks.

“Serif doesn’t,” you say, “Stretch and Red are making an attempt. I don’t know for sure about the others. Look, I’d love to stick around and chat, but I’m not a fan of dirty alleys, and I don’t want Red thinking I’ll actually be out past daybreak.”

“what’s with daybreak?” The scarred skeleton asks.

“If I’m out in the sun, I’ll die,” you say, simply.

“simple as that, huh?” He asks, following you as you leave the alley.

“It’s a painful way to go, actually,” you say, “every part of my body burns as it melts, eventually bursting into flame as I ash.”

You turn to look at him, seeing his eyes narrowed as he seems to be studying you.

“Never asked you your name,” you say, “and it seems Sans gave you mine.”

“it’s g, kid,” he says.

“G?” You parrot back.

“yup. that’s it,” he says.

“Well, G, do you have a ride?” You ask, “or were you planning on walking to the house?”

“catching a cab, actually,” he says.

“No need,” you say, “come on, my car’s not that far, I’ll get us to the house, and then we can both go to bed.”

He doesn’t say anything, but you assume he’s cool to go with you based off the way he follows you to your car, which you had parked in a fairly secluded area that you actually trusted it to come out unscathed on this side of town.

He also doesn’t say anything during the car ride, though you’re sure you can feel that single golden eyelight burning into the side of your head, even as you pull into the extended driveway. Out front, you see Stretch leaned up against the porch railing, a cigarette between his teeth as he seems almost lost, staring at the cloud of smoke rising from its end, illuminated by the porchlight.

“there ya are, hun,” he says as you step out of the car, “you were out for a while.”

“Ran into someone,” you say, as G gets out of the passenger seat. Stretch’s eyesockets widen when he spots him.

“g? you ran into g, of all people, honey?” He asks, “do you even know what the odds of that are?”

“did you know she’s a bloodsucker?” G asks, “bit a man in front of me.”

“That was a hunting trip, and Stretch was aware,” you say, “I told you, everyone in the house knows what I am.”

“you bit someone in front of g, hun?” Stretch asks.

“He wouldn’t leave, and thought I had other intentions,” you justify, holding up your hands.

“hey, in my defense, you asked for a minute of privacy with a drunk guy in an alleyway,” he says.

“i can already tell you two are going to get along just fine,” Stretch says. He puts out his cigarette on the bottom of his shoe, before flicking it into the ashtray, “let’s head on in.”

“That actually sounds really good right now,” you say, following Stretch inside, with G following close behind.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you guys have ideas for chapters, questions for any of the skeletons here, want some headcanons and imagines, or are at all interested in Undertale related rps, come follow me on tumblr [Splintertale Stories](https://splintertale-stories.tumblr.com/)
> 
> asks and submissions are always open, and don't have to be about SSV, NSFW will always be under a cut and tagged


	5. Discussing Halloween

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You and Stretch sit and have a chat about the human holiday of Halloween. Then, after talking to Edge, Stretch gets an idea.
> 
> An idea that you think sounds like a lot of fun, if you're being honest with yourself.

After the fiasco that was your hunting trip, life has gone by relatively normally. Well, as normally as the life of a voluntarily diurnal vampire living with eleven skeleton monsters can be. The irony of living with monsters that can easily be mistaken for the undead is not lost on you.

“heya honey, what ya readin there?” Stretch asks as he walks into the living room, finding you lounged on the couch, in his usual spot, from what you know of the lazy monster.

“It’s a collection of short stories and poems,” you say, “thought it was fitting for the month.”

“and why’s that?” He asks.

“These are old horror stories,” you say, “this is October. Thought I’d get some spooky reading in to fit the general tone of the month.” You mark your page and set your book to the side. The gothic tales were old favorites of yours, but that particular book was old and well loved. You could probably recite all the words from the _Tell-tale Heart_ without even looking at this point.

“ya know, i get you sleep in a coffin, but ya gotta read horror stories too, hun?” Stretch asks, and you just shrug.

“The coffin’s a vampire thing,” you say, “it was made with me in mind and helps me relax. Which, I kind of need since I tend to be active during the day. The stories are just because I like the way they’re written.”

“alright. got nothing against your choice in fiction,” Stretch says, “but what makes october so special for horror stuff?”

“You don’t know about Halloween?” You ask, “how long have you been on the surface?”

“three years,” Stretch says. He watches you like he’s trying to figure out what you’re getting at, “what’s this about halloween?”

“Okay, that is just sad,” you say, “basically, Halloween, and the general month of October is… okay, this is going to be interesting to explain,” you say. You sit up better in the couch, crossing your legs underneath you and patting one cushion and motioning for him to sit.

“maybe, maybe not, hun,” Stretch says, “keep in mind, we tend to figure things out pretty quickly.”

“Yet another reason why my vampirism wouldn’t have gone undiscovered for long,” you say, and he just chuckles at that as he takes the offered seat next to you. “Okay, so, have you been to any human run stores recently? Departments stores, grocery stores, doesn’t matter.”

“yeah, and?” Stretch asks, before letting out a sigh, “the seasonal decorations and shit, right? don’t i feel stupid.”

“Hey, there’s no reason to feel stupid if it’s not something you’re accustomed to,” you say, “it’s reasonable to assume monsters wouldn’t have anything like Halloween underground.”

“and why’s that, hun?” He asks.

“Because the holiday is seen as a general excuse to dress up as monsters and scare each other,” you say with a shrug, and he levels a stare at you, “okay, okay, the old human idea of what a monster was. Vampires, werewolves, zombies, you name it. Some people even dress up as popular characters, like super heroes, though certain video game characters are also popular. There’s also different activities you can participate in, depending on your age range. Kids go around trick-or-treating, where their parents take them around the city, and they go up to houses, knock on the door, say “trick or treat”, and the people in the houses give them candy.”

“humans do something like that?” Stretch asks, “hang on, how do you even know about that stuff, anyway?”

“I was pretty much integrated into human society,” you say, “there has been many a year where I was the one giving out the candy into all hours of the night.”

“okay, so what do the adults do that don’t have kids, or want to hand out candy?” Stretch asks, seeming to accept your answer.

“Easy. Dress in costume and throw a Halloween party,” you say, “drinking, snacks, party games, music, maybe a horror movie on in the background.”

“so what do the skeletons have to do with any of that?” Stretch asks, and at first you’re confused, until you remember. The most common Halloween decorations tend to be skeleton themed. From simple skulls or hands, to full plastic skeletons, in all different sizes. And they tended to be naked.

“Oh, yeah, right,” you say, “it’s the same reason why you’ve been referred to as the undead since moving to the surface. I don’t know how it is for monsters, but for humans, and many kinds of animals, especially the larger ones, and people who were born human, we have skeletons in us. Endo skeletons that help us keep our shape and protect our different systems from damage. And, after death, eventually, all that remains is the skeleton. You guys are the literal face of death.”

“i knew about the skeleton bit,” Stretch says, “but i didn’t realize that it stayed behind like that.”

“Sure does,” you say, “which actually makes me wonder about the origins of skeleton monsters, since you do share so many similarities with a human skeleton. I mean, there are a few…”  You’re cut off by the front door slamming open then closed. You turn and see Edge stomping in towards the kitchen, the heels of his boots clicking against the linoleum as he carries a plastic shopping bag in one of his hands.

“Something wrong Edgelord?” You ask, raising your voice slightly so he can hear you from the kitchen.

“NO, IT’S PERFECTLY REASONABLE TO BE HARASSED BY HUMANS THAT WOULD OTHERWISE LEAVE ME ALONE, ALL BECAUSE OF THIS INANE MONTH,” comes his reply, his tone absolutely dripping with sarcasm.

“Why were you shopping in the human part of the city, anyway?” You ask, getting up off the couch to walk towards the kitchen, “do monsters not require monster food, or something?”

“THE ORIGIN OF THE FOOD HAS LITTLE BEARING ON WHETHER IT TURNS OUT AS MONSTER FOOD OR HUMAN FOOD AFTER IT’S PREPARED,” Edge says, “THAT IS DEPENDENT ON THE MAGIC AND INTENT OF THE CHEF, AS WELL AS THEIR SKILL.”

“So… you went to a human store, got human food, and when it’s cooked, so long as one of you guys does the cooking, it’ll be monster food? Did I get that right?” You ask, and Edge sighs through his nasal cavity.

“NOT ENTIRELY,” the skeleton says, before chuckling at something he just thought of, “CLEVER, DISTRACTING ME FROM WHAT HAD ME SO ANNOYED WHEN I GOT BACK FROM THAT INFURIATING HUMAN STORE.”

“I just tend to push different buttons with people when I talk to them and see what sticks,” you say with a shrug, “so, what’s up? Been getting harassed by shoppers preparing for the upcoming holiday?”

“IS THAT WHAT ALL THAT WAS ABOUT?” Edge’s voice is dripping with annoyance and you’re sure that, yes, humans were in fact harassing him more than usual because Halloween was less than a month away.

“There’s a human holiday called Halloween coming up,” you explain, “it’s the time of year where things that normally scare humans, or are seen as unusual or strange tends to be embraced. You also look kinda like the living dead, while I am the living dead, so there’s that. Or maybe they just thought you were cool and wanted to say hi.”

“YOU THINK I’M COOL?” Edge asks. You arch a brow at him latching onto that particular part of what you said, and notice an amused Stretch standing and watching in the entrance to the kitchen.

“Honestly? In a way, yes, I do,” you say, “your fashion sense definitely lives up to your name, and you wear bitch heals I’d never be caught dead in. You also carry yourself with a confidence I rarely see anymore, though I’d have to get to know you to say for definite.”

“AND WHOSE FAULT IS IT THAT YOU BARELY KNOW ME?” He asks, narrowing his eye sockets at you.

“Yours, Edgelord,” you say, “since you run off every time I pull out the sarcasm. I haven’t gotten a good chance to sit around and really spend time with anyone here yet, actually. The ones I know the best are Stretch and your brother, and I still barely know either of them.”

“do you want to?” Stretch asks suddenly, and you turn to face him.

“What do you mean?” You ask.

“do you want a chance to sit around and get to know all of us?” He’s watching you carefully, even as his fingertips worry at the wrapping around a sucker, easily freeing the candy from its plastic prison.

“Yes, actually,” you say, “I do want to get to know you. All of you.”

“YOU’RE PLANNING SOMETHING, ASHTRASH,” Edge says, and Stretch just shrugs.

“was just thinkin about what y/n said about a halloween party,” Stretch says, “twelve is enough people for a decent enough party, right?”

“So, what? We dress up in costumes and play drinking games to get to know each other?” You ask, and Stretch’s teeth pull up into a more genuine grin around the sucker stick he’d just put in his mouth.

“pretty much, hun,” he says.

“CAN YOU EVEN DRINK, VAMPIRE?” Edge demands.

“Actually? Yeah, I can,” you say, “it doesn’t fight my stomach like human food does.”

“we’ll get monster booze,” Stretch says, “should tell everyone to pick out their costumes.”

“THE FUCK IS ALL THIS ABOUT COSTUMES, ANYWAY?” Edge asks, halfway between a demand and genuine curiosity.

“We’re gonna throw a Halloween party, Edge,” you say, turning to look up at the skeleton who’s currently looking at you like he doesn’t know if you and Stretch are conspiring against him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Didn't expect this chapter to focus on the idea of Halloween, but here we are.
> 
> If you have any costume ideas for the boys, send them my way on tumblr, my blog is [Splintertale Stories](https://splintertale-stories.tumblr.com/)   
> I'm going to try and get a minimum of one more chapter out between now and Halloween, but I really want the party to get a rather long chapter so I can focus on it. Maybe even a two-parter. That's because this is the first bit of real character development for all the boys, including G.


	6. Impromptu Study Dates and Party Preparations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You finally have a little alone time with G after finding him studying up on vampires in the library. Turns out he has the same questions about your kind as you do.
> 
> You also go to a store with the excitable Blueberry to grab some party decorations.
> 
> Oh, and you learn from Sans just how many skeletons there are on your property. It's a fairly decent number, as it turns out.

“so, what’s this i hear about a party?” Sans asks, walking into the kitchen, where he finds you sitting at the table, poking idly at a… taco? That Blue had given you for lunch before he left for work. That was over an hour ago. You’re honestly scared to try it.

“It’s a private thing just for the people who live on this property,” you say, looking up at the skeleton as you push the thing that may have been a taco away, “Stretch came up with the idea after I told him about Halloween, and I happened to say something to Edge that reminded him that I really don’t know you guys all that well.”

“so you want to get to know us better then,” Sans says.

“Yup. Is there anything wrong with that?” You ask, and he just chuckles.

“nah. nothing wrong with that, kiddo,” he says.

“Good. Because I want to get to know all the monsters who call my property home,” you say, and he just blinks at you.

“kid, you’ve already met everyone who lives in the house,” he says.

“But have I met everyone who lives on the property?” He averts his eyelights, focusing on something behind you, “didn’t think so. How many more of you are there, Sans?”

“two,” he says finally, exhaling heavily through his nasal aperture, “both skeletons.”

“Another pair of brothers?” You ask, and he nods, “can you invite them to the party?”

He looks up at you, surprised.

“you’re not upset i never told you about them?” He asks.

“I would have liked to know about them sooner,” you say, “but this way is better than a repeat of how I met G.”

“heard about that,” he says with a nervous chuckle, “i’ll uh, i’ll invite them, but they don’t exactly get along with the rest of us very easily.”

“With as secretive yet observant as you all seem, it’s amazing any of you get along at all,” you say, and he just chuckles at that, more relaxed than he had been just moments earlier.

“it works for us, kid,” he says, “you’ll find we actually know quite a bit about each other.”

“But I don’t,” you say and he looks up at you, “hence the party, Sans.”

“oh, right, you said that,” he says.

“Sure did,” you say. You look down at the table and see the taco has disappeared somewhere. He has a slightly smug look on his face when you look back at him.

“Sneaky skeleton,” you mutter, “someday I will figure out how you’re doing that.” You pick up your plate as he chuckles, “hey, don’t forget to pick out a costume for the party.”

“costume?” He asks, following you as you carry your plate to the kitchen.

“It’s a Halloween party, Sans. Costumes are a must,” you say.

“right, think i remember learning something about the holiday,” sans says, “don’t worry kid, i’ll get a costume figured out.”

He turns to exit the kitchen after you’ve put your plate in the dishwasher, when you remember something you’ve been wanting to ask him.

“Hey, sans? Has G been avoiding me?” You ask, making him stop to look at you.

“what makes you say that?” He asks.

“Well, we didn’t meet on the best of terms,” you say.

“so you’ve said,” he sighs when you prompt him to continue, “no, he’s not avoiding you, kid. at least, i don’t think so. he’s just… g travels a lot, and tends to crash hard when he finally comes home. the surface is a pretty big place, you know?”

“Must be nice to be able to travel in the sun,” you say.

“uh,” Sans starts, eyelights flicking from you, to the covered window, and back.

“I’ve been a vampire for a long time,” you say, “sure, it’s got nothing on being trapped underground, since I’ve always been able to go out at night, but I’ve always found sunlight beautiful. When I can safely see it.”

“windows will be installed sometime in november,” Sans says.

“I still say you didn’t have to pay for those,” you say, and he just chuckles.

“benefits more than just you, kiddo,” he says, “thought we’ve already been through this.”

“Yeah yeah, I know,” you say, “but still, I feel guilty since I own the house.”

“there’s a simple solution to that,” Sans says, “don’t feel guilty.”

“Is stuff like that common for monsters?” You ask.

“stuff like what?” He asks.

“Being weirdly generous,” you say, and he just shrugs.

“maybe humans are all just weirdly greedy,” he says.

“Maybe,” you say, “hey, has everyone left for work yet? Do you know?”

“paps has today out of class,” Sans says, “he’s outside working on his car. think serif was helping him. other than that, just you, me, red and g home.”

“I thought Serif went to work with his brother,” you say, and he just shrugs.

“promised pap he’d help with his car,” Sans says, “only one in the house who doesn’t recruit his help with their ride is Red.”

“Know anyone that’d be willing to help me decorate the place?” You ask, and he looks thoughtful for a moment, before nodding.

“yeah. blue would be more than willing to give you a hand,” he says, “want me to let him know you were looking for him when he gets home?”

“That’d be great,” you say, “I’ll be down in the library.”

“what are you working on down there, anyway?” He asks before you get a chance to take off.

“Honestly? I’ve been looking for mentions of monsters in my old books,” you say, “relations to vampires, reactions to our powers, anything. I’d like to know if either of us is playing with fire now, while we have a chance to prepare, or if we’ll be fine with our current living conditions.”

“is that really a concern?” he asks, his eyelights narrowing slightly, you assume with nerves.

“I don’t know,” you answer honestly, “but I hope it’s not. I like having everyone around.”

“wait, you do?” he asks.

“Yeah, it’s nice. Even if I know it can’t last, I like having people around me who know what I am, and treat me like a person,” you say.

“what do you mean, it can’t last?” He asks, and you just shake your head.

“Never mind. It’s not important,” you say, “I’ll be downstairs.”

 

 

When you reach the library, you’re treated to a sight you were honestly not expecting. You find G sitting down at the table, pouring over one of your old books, taking notes with one hand, while the other occasionally reaches for a nearby drink. He’s wearing a simple grey turtleneck, though the sleeves end at the shoulders, leaving his arms fully exposed, as well as a pair of black leather pants that would be far too tight on a human.

You notice a pair of reading glasses taped to his skull, though you barely notice the tape itself. The damage to his eye sockets must have an effect on his vision, you realize.

“You know, I think you’re the first to come down here to do some research of his own,” you say, making the scarred skeleton jump slightly in his seat, his single eyelight darting over to look at you, “so, anything in particular you’re looking for? If it’s the basic stuff, you can feel free to ask the resident expert on the subject.” You motion to yourself.

“didn’t think ya’d be down here,” he says, going to close the book, but you stop him with a gentle hand before he can, making him look up at you in confusion.

“Library’s open to everyone,” you say, “all books included. I’ll be doing some research of my own while I’m down here, but there’s no reason for you to leave.”

“thought ya were the resident expert?” He asks, a teasing smirk pulling at his teeth.

“With the basic stuff,” you say, pulling your hand away from the book he’d been reading. Your eyes dart over to his notes, finding them written in a set of symbols that looks really familiar. As in, you’d messed around with it several times on your own computer when you’d first discovered it.

“Are you writing your notes in Wingdings?” You ask, and he looks between you and his notes.

“seems i was,” he says, “didn’t even realize i was doin it.” He seems slightly frustrated with that fact, so you decide not to press him on it. Maybe writing in symbols is a monster thing. You don’t really know.

“So, wanna share what you were after?” You ask, “maybe I can be of some help, rather than you having to slog through such a dry read. That can’t be fun.”

“ya claim to be a vampire,” he says, “and i’ve certainly seen ya drink blood. i want to know what that means for the rest of us.”

“You and me both, actually,” you say, and he blinks up at you in surprise, his eyelight following you as you grab a chair to sit across the table from him. “Hey, don’t look so surprised. Monsters are an anomaly for me. I’d actually never met any before stumbling across everyone in this house, despite you all reaching the surface a few years ago.”

“so ya don’t know if ya can survive off monster magic?” He asks, and it’s your turn to look at him in surprise.

“That… honestly never crossed my mind,” you say, “I’ve been slogging through these old books myself to see if there’s any mention of monsters at all, let alone monsters interacting with vampires, or other changed humans.”

“others?” He asks.

“Werewolves, mostly,” you say, “yes, they’re real, not just a product of Hollywood movie magic, or poorly written paranormal romance. So far, I haven’t found anything. I don’t know if you can be affected by the disease that changes a human into a vampire, if you can be affected by my abilities, anything. I’m completely in the dark here, and for once, that’s not a good thing.”

“how would that be a good thing?” He asks.

“Dark… night, you know, the whole sunlight thing,” you say.

“ah, right. i saw a mention of that,” G says, flipping through his notes. You take note of the point where he’d been writing in a more normal script, before it seems to have lapsed over into the symbols, suggesting to you that he’d switched over when he got more into his notetaking. That strikes you as interesting.

“there’s also something in here about a servant called a thrall,” he says, and you frown at that. That had also been far from your mind.

“Thrall has two meanings,” you say, “ancient and modern. The ancient meaning is someone who you can’t turn, but can make totally dependent on you, to the point where they’re compelled to follow your every order happily. They were typically used to do things during the day while their master slept. That’d be the thralls in those old books, the kind that disgusts me.”

“and the modern kind doesn’t?” G asks.

“Considering the term in modern times is used to describe mortals under your protection? No,” you say, “after the turn to the twentieth century, when most vampires immigrated here to the United States to escape the ever looming threat of hunters, it was agreed that the old type of thrall was to never be used again.”

“and the new type?” G prompts.

“Like I said, they’re mortals under your protection,” you say, “say you have someone who knows what you are, but you can’t bring yourself to make them forget, either your attached, or you don’t want to break their trust, what have you. There’s more to it than that, sure, but that’s the basics of it.”

“are we your thralls, then?” G asks.

“No,” you say, “and if I have my way, you never will be. Just the word itself is too possessive for my taste. I just can’t get the old connotation out of my head.”

“begs the question of how old ya are,” G says.

“Why, good sir, did you just presume to ask a lady her age?” You tease, and he blinks at you in surprise, before chuckling slightly.

“suppose i did, didn’t i?” He says.

“I’m sure you’ll find out, eventually,” you say, “just… not right now, alright?”

“fair enough,” he says. He closes the book he’d been reading, before pulling off his reading glasses, which disappear into seemingly nowhere.

“You’re not leaving yet, are you?” You ask, and he looks over at you.

“why?” He asks.

“Because I want to know, can we get over the disaster that was our first meeting? Or did it stain your opinion of me?” You ask.

“i wouldn’t say stain, but it certainly colored it,” he says, “though i’m partially to blame. ya asked me to give ya some privacy and i didn’t listen.”

“That doesn’t quite answer my question, G,” you prompt.

“i think i can look past it, so long as ya answer any questions I have about vampires,” he says, that teasing smirk back on his face.

“If I know the answers, you bet,” you say, “just don’t go telling everyone you know.”

“wouldn’t dream of it,” G says, “some secrets are best kept that way for the safety of everyone involved.”

“Unfortunately, that’s exactly it,” you say, “of course, I’m less concerned for my own safety.”

“guilt by association?” G asks.

“Yup,” you say, “and I don’t like people getting hurt because of me, be it directly or indirectly.”

“ya know, ya kinda remind me of someone,” G mumbles.

“Who’s that?” You ask, and he shakes his head.

“it’s not important. i’ll leave ya to your research,” he goes to get up, but you stop him with a hand around his wrist, and for the first time, you can feel just how smooth and warm the bones of your skeletal housemates actually are. They really feel alive, or at least G does, under your fingertips.

“You don’t have to leave,” you say, and he looks at you with a look of mild surprise, before it shifts back to that teasing grin. Those seem to be the two most common expressions you’ve seen on him so far.

“like havin me down here?” he teases, arching a browridge at you.

“Two heads are better than one?” You try, but the look he gives you tells you he doesn’t believe you, “alright, I was thinking we could look through these old tomes together, and maybe get to know each other while we do so. A first attempt at bonding, maybe.”

“bondin, huh?” G asks, chuckling as you let go of his wrist, confident he’s not going to get away, “this your way of tellin me ya wanna be friends?”

“Maybe,” you admit as he sits back down, “anything wrong with that?”

“nah. just wasn’t expectin it, is all,” he says.

“And I wasn’t expecting to meet someone else who lived in this house while I was out hunting for a drink,” you point out.

“touché.”

The two of you sit at that table going through those old tomes for what feels like hours, though the dry slog is indeed made better by having someone else there to bare it with you. G, as it turns out, greatly enjoys your sarcastic humor, and tosses back his own teasing quips, though you do notice that partway through your impromptu study date, his handwriting switches back to the Wingdings symbols. You decide not to point it out.

 

 

“Y/N, SANS SAID YOU WERE LOOKING FOR ME?” Blue calls out when he enters the library. G had left a little while ago, and you were lounged on one of the beanbag chairs taking a nap, only to jerk awake when the boisterous skeleton barges in.

“Blue? Yeah, I was,” you say from your napping spot.

“REALLY, Y/N? YOU SHOULD SAVE SLEEPING FOR NIGHT,” Blue says, arms crossed as he looks down at you. Lounged as you are, it’s really the only way the small skeleton is taller than you.

“Sorry Blueberry,” you say, moving to stand. You gladly take his hand when he holds it out to help you up, and you’re mildly disappointed when you realize he’s wearing gloves so you can’t see if he feels just as alive under your fingertips as G does. “So, did Sans or your brother tell you what was up?”

“PAPY SUGGESTED SOMETHING ABOUT A PARTY. IS THAT TRUE?” Blue asks.

“Sure is,” you say, “costume party, drinking games, and a chance to really get to know you all,” you say, “and Sans said he’d even invite the other two that live on the property.”

At the mention of the two skeletons you’d yet to meet, Blue looks almost excited. “WE HAVEN’T HAD AXE AND CROOKS OVER FOR A LONG TIME,” he says, “I’M SURE THEY’D LOVE A PARTY. ESPECIALLY IF THERE’S DRINKING AND FOOD INVOLVED. WELL, MORESO AXE THAN CROOKS FOR THE DRINKING. BUT THEY’D BOTH LOVE THE COSTUMES, I’M SURE OF IT!”

“Axe and Crooks? That’s their names?” You ask, and he nods, “well, I did just spend a day with a guy whose name is a single letter, so I guess I shouldn’t be surprised.”

“YOU SPENT THE DAY WITH G?” Blue asks.

“Sure did, Blue. We were both doing some research on the same subject, so we decided to work together on it,” you say.

“TEAMWORK BUILDS COMRADERY,” Blue says, nodding sagely.

“That was the idea,” you say, “also, is it dark out yet?”

“OH! YES, IT IS. WHY, DID YOU WANT TO GO SOMEWHERE?” He asks.

“Was hoping you’d go with me to the store,” you say, “need to pick up some decorations. Maybe some booze while we’re at it.”

“WE CAN GET THE DECORATIONS,” he says, “BUT I THINK WE SHOULD GET SOME MONSTER DRINKS INSTEAD OF HUMAN DRINKS. I’LL SEE IF EDGE WILL HELP ME PICK SOME OUT TOMORROW, SINCE WE BOTH HAVE THE DAY OFF.”

“Why specifically monster drinks?” You ask.

“THEY’RE EASIER ON OUR SYSTEMS, FOR ONE,” he says, “AND THEY MIGHT BE EASIER ON YOUR STOMACH, TOO, SINCE YOU CAN’T EAT HUMAN FOOD. THE MAGIC ALSO NEGATES ANY LONG-TERM ILL EFFECTS, BUT NOT THE HANGOVER, UNFORTUNATELY.”

“I’ll defer to the experts, then,” you say, motioning for him to follow you out of the library, “now come on.”

“SHOULDN’T WE WRITE DOWN A LIST OF WHAT WE NEED, FIRST?” He asks.

“Nah, I already know what I’m after, more or less,” you say, “some simple Halloween decorations to make it look like we at least tried.”

“YOU ALSO HAVE TO GET YOUR COSTUME,” Blue says, “I KNOW A THING OR TWO ABOUT HALLOWEEN FROM MY HUMAN CLIENTS. IF WE’RE HAVING A HALLOWEEN PARTY, YOU NEED TO HAVE A GOOD COSTUME.”

Blue follows you up out of the basement and to your car, sitting next to a light blue motorcycle he proudly tells you is his in the garage. The drive to the store goes by fairly quickly with the two of you tossing ideas back and forth about the party, which Blue only seems marginally upset by the fact that his brother decided they were going to have one virtually last minute, in his opinion.

You pull into the parking lot of the nearest 24 hour department store, and Blue follows you inside as you quickly make a bee-line for the seasonal section. You’d go to a proper holiday store, but those always tend to close by the time it’s dark enough for you to leave the house.

Fortunately, this particular store happens to have a rather large seasonal section.

“WHY DO HUMANS ALWAYS HAVE THOSE INDECENT DECORATIONS?” Blue asks suddenly while you’re looking over the various bags of fake cobwebs. Looking over, you see that he’s pointedly avoiding looking at the display of plastic skeletons.

“Skeletons are seen as the face of death,” you say, and he blinks up at you, confused, “hang on, come here.” He walks over to you, still unsure at what you’re getting at. You hold out your arm, pulling your sleeve back slightly from your wrist. “Take off your glove and feel along here,” you say, motioning to where your bones are closest to the surface on your wrist and hand.

He looks up at you like he’s trying to figure out if you’re trying to deceive him, the ridge of his brows furrowed together over his sockets as he thinks, before his eyelights dart down to your arm.

“LIKE THIS, Y/N?” He asks, taking off his glove and holding it in one hand, before hesitantly ghosting his phalanges over your skin.

“Press down a little bit,” you say, “you should feel something hard just under the skin.”

He does what you say, pressing firm but gently on the back of your wrist, like he’s scared he’s going to hurt you. Just like before with G, you can feel living warmth radiating off his fingertips as he slides them over your skin, just before he presses a little harder as he notices what you were telling him about.

“WHAT IS THAT, Y/N?” He asks, wonder seeping into his voice.

“It’s bone, Blue,” you say, “while you skeletons are all bone, humans have bones inside our bodies. Underneath the muscle and skin, our hands look pretty much the same.”

“REALLY?” He asks.

“Yup,” you say, “that’s why skeleton decorations are a thing. They’re not supposed to be naked skeleton monsters, but long dead humans.”

“IF IT’S ALL THE SAME TO YOU, I STILL THINK THEY’RE INDECENT,” Blue says, letting go of your wrist.

“Alright, got it. No skeleton decorations for the house full of skeletons,” you say, laughing slightly, “I was thinking things like cobwebs, spiders and bats.” You motion to the decorations in question, and he looks over.

“I THINK THOSE WILL DO NICELY,” he says, “BUT THE HOUSE IS GOING TO BE MESSY.”

“It’s only for one night,” you say, “then we can take the decorations down on the first, or whenever everyone is recovered from their hangovers. Whichever comes first.”

“I AM GOING TO HOLD YOU TO THAT,” he says as he helps you grab enough decorating supplies to effectively transform the living room and dining room.

“Deal. Now, wanna help me pick out a costume?” You ask, and he looks up at you.

“AREN’T THERE HOLIDAY SPECIFIC STORES? WOULDN’T THEY HAVE MORE COSTUMES?” He asks.

“Yeah, but you know why I can’t go to one of those, Blue,” you say.

“SO I HAVE AN IDEA,” Blue says, “YOU TELL ME YOUR SIZE, THEN TOMORROW, WHILE I’M OUT WITH EDGE, OR IN PAPY’S TRUCK IF EDGE WON’T GO TO THE STORE WITH ME, I’LL PICK OUT A COSTUME FOR YOU. I CAN GET MORE DECORATIONS THEN, TOO.”

“Gonna pick out a costume for yourself while you’re there?” You ask.

“WELL, PAPY DIDN’T GIVE ME ENOUGH TIME TO MAKE MY OWN, OTHERWISE I WOULD,” he says, crossing his arms. Somehow, his cheekbones puff out in a slight pout, an expression you find endearing on the energetic skeleton.

“I’ll write it down for you when we get home,” you say, “I’m trusting you, Blue, it had better be a good one.”

“IT’LL BE THE BEST!” Blue declares, excitedly, “AND THEN, NEXT YEAR, SINCE I’LL KNOW YOU BETTER THAN I DO NOW, I’LL BE ABLE TO PICK OUT AN EVEN BETTER ONE FOR YOU!”

“Better than the best, huh?” You tease, and he puffs out his chest slightly.

“DO YOU EXPECT ANYTHING LESS FROM THE MAGNIFICENT BLUEBERRY? MWEH HEE HEH, IT’LL BE PERFECT!”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Have story suggestions? Have anything you want to ask the boys from the story, or asks about or for skeletons in general? Hit me up:
> 
> [Splintertale Stories](https://splintertale-stories.tumblr.com/)
> 
> NSFW will always be tagged and/or under a cut


	7. Enter Axe and Crooks - Holloween Party Part 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You get help from the skeletons for some last minute decorating, and Axe and Crooks show up to the party early.
> 
> Oh, and you also learn that the skeletons had a pretty big secret of their own, you don't blame them for not wanting to tell you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for not getting this up earlier today, but I've been busy the last couple of days and unable to write, but this chapter ended up so long I had to break the Halloween chapter up into two parts. I hope that makes up for the slight delay. I'll try to get the next part up at a reasonable hour.
> 
> Hopefully, the next holiday chapter will be posted on time, I'm looking forward to Gyftmas

“SO, Y/N, WHY ARE WE DECORATING THE LIVING ROOM WITH COBWEBS AND SMALL PLASTIC CREATURES?” Papyrus asks from where he’d just pinned part of the fake cobwebs in one of the upper corners of the room. Bless his height and long, lanky limbs, he really is the best decorating assistant.

“They’re Halloween decorations, Papyrus, for the party tonight,” You say, handing him a plastic spider that he nestles into the cobwebs, before stepping down from the small stepladder that even he still needed in the high-ceilinged room.

“OH, YES, THE COSTUME PARTY I’VE BEEN LOOKING FORWARD TO,” Papyrus says, “YOU’LL BE PLEASED TO KNOW THAT MY COSTUME IS NEARING COMPLETION, I AM GOING TO PICK UP THE FINAL PIECE TONIGHT BEFORE THE PARTY, IN FACT!”

“You’re making your own costume from bits and pieces?” You ask as the two of you move to put more of the decorations up in another part of the living room.

“NORMALLY, I WOULD MAKE THE WHOLE THING FROM SCRATCH, BUT I SIMPLY DIDN’T HAVE THE TIME,” he says, “SO, NATURALLY, I DID THE NEXT BEST THING, NYEH HEH HEH!”

“Sounds like you take costume parties pretty seriously,” you say, “you know it’s just going to be all of us, right?”

“OF COURSE! COSTUME PARTIES ARE ALWAYS FUN, AND SOMETHING TO LOOK FORWARD TO,” he says, “AND YES, IT IS JUST US. ALL FOURTEEN OF US.”

“Is that going to be a problem, Paps?” You ask, looking up at him.

“NO!” He answers, almost too quickly, “WELL, I HOPE NOT? AXE AND CROOKS ARE JUST… DIFFERENT THAN THE REST OF US, WHICH IS WHY THEY CHOOSE TO LIVE OUT IN THE WOODS, RATHER THAN IN THE HOUSE WITH THE REST OF US.” He rings his hands together, that nervous gesture you’d seen from him the first night you’d met him.

You wonder if that’s the reason for his gloves.

“Do you not get along with them?” You ask.

“WELL, NOT AS WELL AS BLUEBERRY DOES,” he says.

You hear a door slam down the hall and turn to look, seeing Blackberry stomp down the hall, the bones of his feet clacking against the hardwood floor.

“YOU, VAMPIRE! IF YOU EVER PLAN A PARTY AGAIN, GIVE THE REST OF US MORE TIME TO PREPARE!” He demands, practically glaring at you.

“Sorry, Black. It was kind of a last minute thing,” you say, “and to be fair, it was kind of Stretch’s idea.”

“throwin stretch under tha bus? tha’s cold, y/n,” Mutt says, walking lazily behind his brother. You catch his eyes on you again. He seems to study you with nearly every interaction.

“I’m hardly throwing him under the bus,” you say, “I’m just saying, I didn’t really come up with the idea. I just rolled with it as a way to get to know you guys.”

“so ya wanna get ta know us, huh?” Mutt asks.

“Hey, try putting yourself in my shoes for a bit,” you start, “here I am, living with a bunch of guys I hardly know, that are not only renting my home from me, but also know my deepest secret.”

“is it really yer deepest secret, though?” Mutt asks, a teasing tone to his voice.

“If you want to know that, you’ll just have to get to know me, now won’t you?” You say, teasing back. He just chuckles at you as he moves to flop back on the couch, earning himself an annoyed glare from his brother.

“WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU’RE DOING, MUTT?” Black demands, and Mutt just shrugs.

“what’s it look like, m’lord? relaxin,” he says.

“GET OFF YOUR LAZY ASS AND HELP WITH THE DECORATIONS, MUTT! YOU’RE AT LEAST AS TALL AS THE CREAMPUFF,” Black says, and Mutt lets out a long suffering sigh as he stands. He puts on a show like he’s annoyed with his brother’s orders, but he does hold out his hands for the decorations you’d been holding.

“Uh, here,” you say, handing him a bag of fake cobwebs.

“ya look nervous, y/n. jus helpin with tha decoratin,” Mutt says, “i don bite, promise.”

“no, but she does,” G says, walking into the living room from the stairs down into the basement. He’s wearing the same sweater and leather pants combo as before, but this time you notice he’s also got a cropped jacket that ends around where you guess the bottom of his ribcage would be, the sleeves of which only go down to his elbows.

“I guess next time I ask you to give me privacy if you run into me hunting, you will, huh?” You quip back, “didn’t we go over this the other day? I seem to remember you saying you were willing to look past that.”

“WAIT! YOU BIT HIM?!” Black says, and he sounds far more nervous than you think he meant to.

“nah, black,” G says calmly, “found her in an alley with some drunk slobberin all over her, and she asked me for some alone time with him. didn’t know what she was going to do, so i didn’t leave, so she bit him, right then and there.”

“Okay, to be fair, I was getting thirsty enough I was beginning to see pulse points without actually looking for them, so I had to go out hunting,” you say.  
  
“PULSE POINTS ON WHO, Y/N?” Papyrus asks. You look up to see faint concern on his face, and you’re torn. They deserve to know that your instincts seem to mark them as prey, just like humans. But you also want them to trust you.

But what if it gets out of hand and you didn’t warn them ahead of time? That could easily break any fragile form of trust you form with them.

“On Red and Stretch, Papyrus,” you say, “and I could sense everyone else in the house. My body started hunting without my permission.”

“SO YOU WERE HUNTING US!?” Black practically screeches, and you’re sure he’s trying to seem tougher than he looks to you right now.

“That’s why I had to go to the city,” you say, raising your hands in a placating manner and backing away slightly, “I don’t want to hurt anyone, and I know humans can recover.”

“I BELIEVE YOU,” Papyrus says, making you look up at him, where you find him looking at you, thoughtfully.

“Wait, you do?” You ask, and he nods.

“YES! YOU ASSESSED THE DANGER AND TOOK THE INITIATIVE TO LEAVE BEFORE ANYBODY COULD GET HURT,” he announces, “I KNOW THAT LIKELY TAKES QUITE A BIT OF WILLPOWER ON YOUR PART, ESPECIALLY SINCE MAGICAL FOOD DOESN’T SEEM TO QUELL YOUR THIRST ANY, SINCE I ALSO KNOW YOU’VE LEFT A FEW TIMES SINCE THEN.”

“One time I went to the store with Blue,” you say.

“YES, THAT IS TRUE,” Papyrus says, “AND HE CAME BACK COMPLETELY UNSCATHED. JUST LIKE G WHO RAN INTO YOU WHILE YOU WERE HUNTING. YOU SEE, BLACK? Y/N WON’T HURT US, I’M SURE OF IT!”

Black looks between you and Papyrus, and while he doesn’t seem entirely convinced, he does seem to relax some, the tension you could see in his shoulders deflating a bit.

“I’M STILL GOING TO KEEP MY EYE ON YOU, VAMPIRE,” he says.

“That’s fair, Black,” you say, “I would keep an eye on me, too. After all, trust is earned, not given.”

“THAT IS VERY TRUE,” the small skeleton says, “NOW, GET BACK TO DECORATING! I WILL OBSERVE AND MAKE SURE YOU ALL DO IT CORRECTLY. DON’T HALF ASS IT, AND HURRY UP SO WE CAN CHANGE INTO OUR COSTUMES ON TIME!”

“SPEAKING OF COSTUMES, Y/N, WHAT IS YOURS GOING TO BE?” Papyrus asks from where he’d already gotten back to work, stringing up a set of bat shaped lights you’d thought were strangely cute when you bought them.

“I don’t know yet,” you say, “Blue said he’d pick one out for me. He was also supposed to help with the decorating, but he’s almost as short as Black and was having trouble with it, which is why he went to go get you to help me instead.”

“AH YES, I DO REMEMBER THAT,” Papyrus says.

“WHILE BLUE AND I BOTH HAVE MANY GREAT QUALITIES, MYSELF MORESO THAN HIM, CLEARLY, OUR HEIGHT IS OBVIOUSLY NOT ONE OF THEM,” Black says, “I WILL READILY ADMIT THAT EDGE HAS ME BEAT IN THE DEPARTMENT OF THE GREAT AND TERRIFYING VISAGE, THOUGH I HAVE THE ADVANTAGE OF LURING FOES INTO A FALSE SENSE OF SECURITY, THEN SURPRISING THEM WITH MY MIGHT, OR HAVING MY MUTT TAKE CARE OF THEM FOR ME.”

“So, we went from talking about height, to a dick measuring contest, to Black subtly threatening to sick Mutt on me, all in the course of a single, long sentence,” you say, earning a scandalized look from Papyrus, “I’m impressed.”

“Y/N! HOW CAN YOU SAY SOMETHING SO CRASS?” Papyrus asks, “I THOUGHT YOU WERE BETTER THAN OUR HOUSEMATES WHEN IT CAME TO FILTERING YOUR LANGUAGE. BLACKBERRY NEVER ONCE SAID ANYTHING ABOUT A DICK!”

“Pap, that is…” you look at him, stunned for a moment, “okay, that has got to be the weirdest reprimand I have ever received, it’s both innocent and not at the same time… how…?”

“welcome ta life with paps, y/n,” Mutt says from where he’s currently using magic to levitate one of the larger spiders by the dangling web from its abdomen to the ceiling, much to the chagrin of his glaring brother, “he an blue both have tha whole innocent act down, but they’re both grown ass adults, an they’ll occasionally say something that’ll remind ya a that, too.”

“I’LL HAVE YOU KNOW, THAT AS A SKELETON, I DON’T HAVE AN ASS,” Papyrus says, “BUT IF I DID, IT WOULD BE VERY GREAT. LIKE ME!”

“Oh, so humble,” you say, earning a bit of laughter from everyone in the room. Even Blackberry chuckled a bit at your remark, “but no, I get that everyone here is an adult. I’ve been doing a bit of research, don’t monster children wear stripes or something?”

“YES INDEED!” Papyrus says, “IT MAKES IT EASIER TO TELL WHO’S GROWN AND WHO’S NOT, SINCE SOME SPECIES OF MONSTER SEEM TO PHYSICALLY AGE DIFFERENTLY THAN OTHERS. THAT, AND AS YOU’VE SEEN, SOMETIMES THERE CAN BE A HUGE SIZE DISCREPANCY BETWEEN ADULTS OF THE SAME SPECIES, WHICH CAN LEAD TO SMALLER SKELETONS LIKE SERIF OR BLACK TO BE CONFUSED FOR CHILDREN BY HUMANS.”

“IT IS HUMILIATING,” Black says, “SOMEONE AS GREAT AS THE MALEFIC SA- BLACKBERRY, CONFUSED FOR A MERE CHILD. MWAH, I’M LIKELY OLDER THAN ANY OF THOSE FUCKWHIT HUMANS, AND THEY HAVE THE NERVE TO CALL ME A CHILD!”

What did Black nearly call himself? You decide not to pry, since he caught it so quickly, but he was definitely going to call himself something else, other than Blackberry, you’re sure of it.

Your conversation is cut short by a knock at the door, and then the doorbell ringing. Papyrus looks between you and the door, and you shrug.

“I’ll stand over here if you want to answer the door,” you say, moving over by the couch, which you know from prior experience is safe with how the door opens inward. He nods as you move, and walks over to the door, opening it when he’s sure you’re safe.

“AXE! CROOKS! YOU’RE BOTH EARLY! NOT THAT THAT MATTERS, COME ON IN,” He cheerily motions for the two monsters to enter the house, and when they enter your line of sight, you’re struck by their appearance. The smaller of the two brothers reminds you strikingly of Sans, complete with that same blue jacket, basketball shorts and a dusty old pair of slippers. Though his clothes look old and tattered, and stained with something you know likely isn’t ketchup.

What really strikes you about him is the large hole in his head, and the bright, pulsing red eyelight that eventually finds its way to you, the skeleton freezing as he spots you.

“BROTHER, WHAT’S WRONG?” Asks a voice that sounds eerily like Papyrus, but is coming from the larger of the two brothers. Really, he’s the largest of any of the skeletons you’ve ever seen. He’s slightly hunched over, and somehow appears gaunt, with sunken eye sockets and large, crooked teeth, stained slightly red. “OH! HELLO, UH, HUMAN?”

“Axe and Crooks?” You ask, not sure what else to say to these new arrivals just yet.

“OH! YES! I AM CROOKS, AND MY BROTHER IS CALLED AXE!” The large skeleton says. You finally realize what he’s wearing. It’s a gleaming suit of armor with a flowing red cape, the hunched skeleton clearly dressed as a gallant knight.

“so, you’re the homeowner, huh?” Axe says. His voice is gruff, like he’s more used to growling or grunting, but just like how his brother sounds like Papyrus, Axe sounds eerily like Sans.

“You know, six sets of brothers who all seem to follow the same set pattern is really convenient,” you say, and he blinks at you, his sockets widening slightly, before his expression shifts to something halfway between amused and an emotion you can’t quite place your finger on.

“so, you’ve figured it out just from seeing me and my bro, have you?” He says, shoving his hands in the pockets of his hoodies. You hear the door click shut, and see Papyrus looking over at you from his position next to it, ringing his hands together again.

“It was the straw that broke the camel’s back, so to speak,” you say, “you and your brother just happen to look a lot like Sans and Papyrus. And I mean more than the others do.”

“YOU’RE NOT MAD AT US, ARE YOU, Y/N?” Papyrus asks, which just confirms what you’d been thinking. Everyone here, somehow, are different versions of the same two skeletons. Not that you know how it’s possible, but all the similarities between your housemates are just far too convenient for them to be cousins or something similar. You’d thought you’d finally went off the deep end.

“Honestly? No, Paps. Would I have liked to have been told when you guys learned my secret? Yes. Am I mad? No,” you say, and Papyrus deflates a little, though Axe makes a curious noise.

“what secret is that, then?” He asks, his single red eyelight watching you.

“I’ll tell you mine if you tell me yours,” you say. You take note of the shirt mostly hidden under his stained hoodie. It reads “this is my Halloween costume”, and is the only thing he’s wearing that’s not stained.

“and what secrets do you think i’m hiding?” Axe says, his expression growing slightly manic.

“How about the origins of those stains,” you say, “I have a suspicion that’s not ketchup. I’m right, aren’t I?” You say, and he just chuckles, though you’re not quite sure if he’s exactly amused with your question or not. Axe doesn’t seem quite right to you.

“Y/N, AXE AND HIS BROTHER WERE ONCE IN A POSITION LIKE YOURS. BUT TEMPORARY, AND MORE… PERMANENT. JUST, WITHOUT THE AVERSION TO THE SUN,” Papyrus says, though when you look at him, he seems to be looking anywhere but at you.

It takes you a second to realize what he’s getting at, but when you do, the different things about their appearance click for you. Crooks’ twisted, gaunt form, his sunken sockets and slightly bowed knees. The stains all over his brother’s clothes. These two particular skeletons have been through hell, haven’t they?

“I hope you’re both no longer doing what Paps just hinted at,” you say, “disappearances are hell to explain away, and I have a strict no-kill policy.” That earns you a startled laugh from Axe.

“so, mind telling me what he meant when he said temporary but more permanent, then?” Axe says.

“SHE’S CLEARLY ALREADY FIGURED OUT THAT YOU AND YOUR BROTHER USED TO EAT HUMANS!” Black declares, “SO STOP PLAYING DUMB! YOU KNOW HE MEANS THAT SHE DOESN’T KILL ANYONE, BUT FEEDS FROM HUMANS AS WELL.”

“Subtle, Blackberry,” you say, and he just grumbles at you.

“so, what? you some sorta cannibal or something?” Axe asks, “or do you think you’re above that because you supposedly don’t kill anyone?”

“BROTHER!” Crooks shrieks.

“I’d have to be human myself,” you say, and he arches a brow ridge at you, an expression that is very Sans, “I’m a vampire. Something that was once human, but is the equivalent of a walking corpse that feeds on human blood to survive. Killing isn’t necessary, it makes our powers more potent, but doesn’t increase the amount of time we can go between feedings. That explain how you’re temporary but permanent yet?”

“WAIT! YOU MEAN YOU PURPOSEFULLY MAKE YOURSELF WEAKER THAN YOU COULD BE?” Black asks.

“Considering the alternative? Yes,” you say.

“so, what, you think you’re above me and my bro?” Axe asks.

“Hardly,” you say, and he blinks at you in surprise, “you and Crooks look like you’ve both been through hell. Desperate times call for desperate measures. I’m not going to ask for specifics, but you both look like you’ve been starved at some point in your lives. Taking that into consideration, I’d be a hypocrite if I condemned you for what was likely a necessary diet.”

“BUT NOT ONE WE HAVE TO RESORT TO HERE, ON THE SURFACE,” Crooks says, “HONEST. AND ISN’T THIS SUPPOSED TO BE A PARTY? SHOULDN’T WE BE HERE TO HAVE FUN, NOT TALK ABOUT… UNPLEASANT THINGS?”

“You’re a little early, big guy,” you say, looking up at him, “but you can help finish putting up the decorations if you like so we can get it done ahead of time.”

“WE’D HAVE BEEN DONE SOONER IF EVERYONE HADN’T INSISTED ON CHATTING!” Black exclaims.

“i remember ya getting pretty chatty yerself, m’lord,” Mutt says, “ya were bragging, even.”

“OF COURSE I WAS, MUTT! YOU MUST TAKE EVERY CHANCE YOU GET TO BOAST, IT’S THE RULE!” Black exclaims, “AND SINCE I AM A VERY EXCEPTIONAL SKELETON, AND NOW THAT THE VAMPIRE KNOWS OUR SECRET, I CAN FREELY SAY THAT I WAS THE CAPTAIN OF THE ROYAL GUARD, I HAVE EVERY RIGHT TO BOAST AT ANY OPPORTUNITY!”

“y/n knows our secret?” You whirl around to find Sans suddenly behind you again, staring at you with wide eye sockets and narrowed eyelights, clearly beginning to sweat a bit.

“I’m not an idiot, Sans,” you say, motioning to Axe, and he just sighs.

“no. no you’re not,” he says.

After the interesting event that was meeting Axe and Crooks, the rest of the decorating goes smoothly. You even learn a few things about your new guests while finishing up, like the fact that Crooks likes to experiment with unconventional meats like venison or mutton rather than the usual beef chicken or pork when he cooks. Or anything that he can get his hands on, really. He likes having the variety.

You also learn that Axe has a penchant for morbid humor. Cannibal jokes and the like that have earned awkward silences from your housemates, but earned a few startled laughs out of you, if you’re being honest.

At least he seems to be trying to warm up to you?

Soon enough though, you’re grabbed by a gloved hand and pulled out of the living room by an excited Blueberry.

“I HOPE YOU’RE EXCITED, Y/N! I PICKED THE BEST COSTUME FOR YOU, AND NOW YOU FINALLY GET TO SEE IT!” You notice that he’s dressed up like Mario, complete with a stick-on mustache.

“Please tell me your brother is Luigi,” you say, and he just beams up at you.

“OF COURSE HE’S LUIGI,” Blue says, “NOT ONLY IS HE TALLER THAN ME LIKE MARIO’S BROTHER, BUT HE’S ALSO THE YOUNGER BROTHER, JUST LIKE THE ACTUAL MARIO AND LUIGI! IT’S PERFECT! BUT, THAT’S NOT WHAT I GRABBED YOU FOR.” He tugs you up the stairs, and realize, you don’t know where everyone’s rooms are.

Probably for the best, you’d imagine you wouldn’t want a predator knowing where you slept at night, either.

Blue drags you towards a door decorated with several glow-in-the-dark stars that’s painted the same bright blue as his eyelights, quickly tugging you inside.

“YOU CAN FEEL FREE TO LOOK AROUND WHILE I GET YOUR COSTUME FROM WHERE I HID it,” he says, before darting off to his closet. You can’t help but notice that his room is also painted that same bright blue, more of the stars stuck to the ceiling and even the walls, arranged in actual constellations. Against one of the walls is a rocket ship bed with a variety of plush toys arranged on it, and another wall has a table with various action figures. The curtains are tightly drawn, and on the wall next to the window are two tall bookcases, tightly packed with a huge variety of books.

This skeleton really is an interesting one.

“You know, I met Axe and Crooks already. They came over early,” you say while he pulls a couple of bags out of the closet. What catches your eye immediately is that you can clearly see the color red, so that rules out him dressing you as Princess Peach to try and complete the set.

“I HOPE YOU CAN GET ALONG WITH THEM,” He says, handing you the bags, “I’VE BEEN REALLY EXCITED FOR YOU TO MEET THEM!”

“It’s still up in the air whether I get along with Axe or not,” you say, “but I did figure something out. About all of you guys.”

“AND WHAT’S THAT, Y/N?” He asks.

“The fact that your name is really Sans, for one,” you say, and he looks surprised, and then kind of sad.

“I WANTED TO TELL YOU, REALLY,” Blue says, “IT ONLY SEEMED FAIR SINCE WE ALREADY KNEW YOUR SECRET, BUT PAPY REMINDED ME THAT WE WEREN’T SUPPOSED TO TELL ANYONE. BUT PAPYRUS WASN’T LYING WHEN HE SAID I WAS BLUEBERRY. IT IS MY NAME, JUST NOT MY ORIGINAL NAME, YOU KNOW?”

“It’s alright Blue, I’m not mad, if that’s what you think,” you say, “I’d been suspecting it for a while now, but I never voiced anything because I thought I was going crazy.”

“HOW DID YOU FIGURE IT OUT?” Blue asks, curiosity peeking through his voice, “I MEAN, REALLY FIGURE IT OUT.”

“Axe’s quote “Costume” helped,” you admit, emphasizing the air-quotes around the word costume, “and by helped, I mean it was clearly just his normal clothes with a new t-shirt under his jacket.”

“I CAN SEE WHERE THAT WOULD GIVE HIM AWAY,” Blue mutters, before shaking his head, “BUT ANYWAY, GO, SHOO, GO PUT YOUR COSTUME ON! I WANNA SEE HOW IT LOOKS ON YOU.”

“Okay, okay, I’m going,” you say, leaving the room as Blue shoos you out.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you're wondering about Vamp figuring out that the skeletons are all Sans and Papyrus, and thinking that she shouldn't have known, don't worry, while I didn't explicitly state anything, I tried to put little hints into the previous chapters that she was starting to piece it together (foreshadowing is still fairly new to me, so I know I might not have done so well. This is my first real fic and is a learning experience for me that we're all having fun with together)


	8. Interuptions and update

Hey, so I know that I said the second half of the Halloween party was going to be up tonight, but that's likely not going to happen.

I'm not going to go into detail, but something happened yesterday that made me have a bit of a panic attack (I have a generalized anxiety disorder that I'm taking medication for, usually have it under control), so I wasn't able to sit down and finish up the chapter yesterday, and I was out of the house today

I promise the already late chapter will be up tomorrow, I wanted to give a bit of a heads up with what was happening


	9. Halloween Party - The long-awaited Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The big costume reveal! Also, fun and games, and...
> 
> arguing, sort of.
> 
> Also, why are Black and Blue acting so odd now?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay! A month later and I finally got the Halloween chapter done!
> 
> I REALLY wanted to get this done sooner, but between my returning anxiety, and catching a serious case of bronchitis immediately after I start working, I just haven't been up to typing too much
> 
> At least this is a fairly big chapter, so I hope that makes up for it.
> 
> Thanks to all of you who gave me words of encouragement and for waiting patiently. It really means a lot, and I hope you all enjoy reading this chapter as much as I did actually managing to sit down and write it.

You manage to refrain from looking in the bags Blue handed you until you actually got to your own room, though you have to admit, you were curious. Setting the bags down on the dresser, you open the first, which reveals its contents as being a long, hooded red cape that you estimate to be floor length while wearing it. It was obviously a cheaper costume material, and a quick examination revealed it to still have the tags, but it was still pretty nice, all things considered.

The next bag you opened revealed its contents to be a knee length dress. The detailing on the dress imitated the look of a clean white blouse, a black corset coming up just under the bust. The skirt was red and pleated. The dress itself was simple, a little white lacing on the faux corset, white cap sleeves that went just past your shoulders, but the effect, when combined with the cape was immediate.

Blue’s costume of choice for you was Red Riding Hood.

Emptying out the rest of the bags revealed a pair of elbow length gloves, a simple pair of black boots that ended just shy of your knees, and some costume makeup. You even find a basket, which had been holding the gloves and makeup

Trying on the outfit, you find that Blue did get it in your size, and you have to admit, the thought of being hunted by the big bad wolf while you yourself were probably out hunting the woodsman amuses you.

You make quick work of getting the costume on, and doing up your makeup. While it’s true you can’t see yourself in some mirrors, those are the older ones made with a silver backing. You have no problem using modern mirrors.

After finishing up your makeup, you look at yourself in the mirror, before coming up with an idea. Yeah, Blue picked out your costume, but he didn’t say anything about adding your own twist. Grabbing the makeup kit again, you see it does come with a tube of fake blood.

With a grin, you extend your own fangs, before extending a line of the fake blood from the corner of your mouth down to your chin. You then drip a couple of drops onto the blouse part of your dress to complete the look.

You doubt the big bad wolf would have known what to do if his intended prey turned out to be you.

With one last look at yourself, you flip the hood of your cape up over your head, grab your basket, and head upstairs.

“Y/N, YOU LOOK SO PRETTY!” You hear Blue announce when you get up to the living room. Turning your attention to him, you see he’s practically bouncing in his seat where he’s sat next to his brother. Stretch clad in the green shirt and overalls of Luigi definitely meets all your expectations. You can barely see his own grin under the mustache stuck to his face.

“You haven’t even seen my final touch yet, Blue,” you say, pushing back the hood, revealing your own additions. He looks at you with wide eye sockets, and you think you notice his eyelights trail down the line of fake blood and back up. When he notices your fangs, his face dusts with a light blue, before he almost seems to frown. “What? Don’t like it?” You ask.

“NO, I DO,” Blue says, “THE DRESS LOOKS REALLY PRETTY ON YOU, AND I LIKE YOUR IDEA, BUT…”

“But? What’s up, Blue?” You ask.

“DON’T YOU TRY TO HIDE THE FACT THAT YOU’RE A VAMPIRE?” Blue asks.

“Not from you guys,” you say, shaking your head, “you all already know what I am. If you don’t like the idea of a vampiric Little Red, it’s an easy enough fix. But uh, I think the dress is stained for good, now.”

“WELL, IT IS JUST A COSTUME DRESS I GOT FROM THE HALLOWEEN STORE,” Blue says, before standing up off the couch, “I’M GONNA GO SEE IF PAPYRUS HAS THE SNACKS READY.” He heads off towards the kitchen, leaving you to watch him, thoroughly confused, and slightly disappointed. You thought Blue would love the idea.

“ya alright, honey?” Stretch asks, and you turn your attention back to him.

“Do you know what’s up with your brother?” You ask, sitting down next to Stretch in the spot that Blue had just vacated.

“dunno,” Stretch admits, “wait, actually, paps told us something you said to him. something about seeing pulse points that time red and i caught you going out to get a drink.”

“That’s because I was thirsty and my body was screaming at me to feed,” you say, flopping back on the couch, “my senses went into hunting mode without my permission, you know, something I can normally do at will, but usually don’t.”

“why not?” He asks, prompting you to turn to face him. Despite the ridiculousness of the fake mustache on a face without skin, you see he’s slightly nervous, but still giving you the benefit of the doubt. Just like he said he would back when you attempted to have movie night with him, Red and Serif.

“Because I want to see the people around me as just that,” you say, “people. You guys aren’t… you’re not prey. I see pulse points because it’s my kind’s way of knowing the best places to bite to get the most the quickest. I don’t… Look, it’s already bad enough I have to drink blood to survive, the last thing I need to do is walk around dehumanizing everyone I see… De… monsterizing? What’s the monster equivalent of dehumanizing, anyway?”

“i think i get what you’re going for, hun,” Stretch says. He seems to almost visibly relax, leaning back on the couch more.

“so, not proud of what you are, huh?” That gruff Sans-but-not-sans voice you recognize as Axe asks, making you turn to face him. Seems he has the same sneak powers as Sans, though, that’s not really a surprise to you at this point.

“I’m not proud of the required diet,” you say, “but, at this point, when I live with a bunch of people who know what I am? Why hide it? Why bother denying what everyone already knows when it’s such a big part of me?” As you speak, you see that single red eyelight of his focus in on the fake blood, much like Blue had.

You get an idea, opening your mouth to reveal your fangs to him, and quickly retract them. That single eyelight of his narrows to a pinprick as he looks up at your eyes, and you think he’s trying to read you.

“heh, i would say it’s knife to meat ya,” he starts, “but we’ve already met.”

“Well, I have to say fangs for giving me a second chance after our, admittedly odd meeting,” you say, letting your fangs extend again as you do so, and Axe chuckles as his grin grows more genuine.

“thought ya were trying to trick me with the whole same but different bit,” Axe says, “though, my judgement ain’t all it’s cracked up to be, these days.”

“And to think, Paps was worried about me meeting you,” you say, and he stops from where he was turning to go sit down.

“he was?” Axe asks, and you can see his grin turn slightly more manic.

“Hey, I think he thought my circumstances would upset you, or something,” you say, “I promise, he didn’t say anything negative about you.”

You can see he’s about to say something else, when you’re interrupted by Crooks coming into the room, holding a large plate of what appear to be… spaghetti tacos. You seriously hope Blue didn’t have a hand in making those.

“OH, HELLO Y/N!” He announces when he sees you, “BLUEBERRY WAS RIGHT, YOU LOOK GREAT IN YOUR COSTUME.”

“Uh, thanks, Crooks,” you say, and he practically beams, “hey, I uh, I think I upset your brother.”

Crooks looks between you and Axe and sighs.

“YES, I HEARD YOUR CONVERSATION. NOW COME ON, SANS, SIT DOWN,” Crooks urges Axe to sit in the arm chair he’d been headed towards, which he complies to, grumbling slightly, “YOU WERE TALKING ABOUT… HEALTHY ME’S HESITANCE FOR YOU TO MEET US.”

“Healthy…? Did I, should I have not mentioned that?” You ask, and Crooks shakes his head.

“THE HEALTHY, SLIGHTLY SMALLER VERSION OF ME IS A MONSTER WHO BELIEVES IN EVERYONE, EVEN US,” Crooks says, “HE SEES THE PART OF MY BROTHER THAT’S STILL… SANS. I’M NOT SAYING THAT HE ISN’T, BUT…”

“It’s okay, big guy, I get it,” you interrupt, and he seems relieved, finally setting the snacks down on the coffee table.

“an jus what ‘re ya sayin ya get?” Axe asks, looking at you.

“I’m just saying, it’s clear you’ve been through hell,” you say, and his eyelight focuses on you again, narrowing as he seems to be thinking over what you’re saying.

“she’s sayin that she can see that you’re sans, but you’re not this world’s version of sans, axe,” G says, walking in from down the hall. You look up to see him, only to be greeted by the sight of him dressed as an old time gangster. Actually, if monsters had been around at the time, you’d say he was walking right out of the early twentieth century.

After all, everything about his appearance, from the pinstripe suit, to his hat, and even his well-polished shoes reminded you of the era, and you had to admit, it looked good on him.

“goin for a bit of an innocence lost theme are ya?” He asks, and you realize you’ve actually been staring at him. Something he lets you know he noticed with a smirk.

“Well, Blue picked out the costume, all I did was this,” you motion to the fake blood, “and I think it might have upset him.”

“i can tell ya right now it didn’t,” G says, “blue’s been actin odd ever since pap told everyone what ya said about your instincts kickin in. usually means he has something on his mind.”

“Oh, G, what did you mean when you said Axe wasn’t this world’s version of Sans?” You ask, and he sighs.

“yeah, enlighten us,” Axe says, “or don’t say shit ya don’t intend to explain.”

“it’s not something that’s really that easy to explain, but we have some time while we’re waiting for everyone else to get their costumes on, or grab drinks,” G says, walking over and sitting on the arm of the couch nearest you. “alright, so, ya know how everyone here is a sans or a pap. well, mostly, though i’m kinda a sans myself.”

You can tell there’s more to it than that, but you don’t press him on it, instead urging him to continue.

“alright, so, there’s this deal called the multiverse,” he continues, “there’s an infinite number of possible worlds, and infinitely more possible outcomes for each world. most of us are from worlds that differ greatly from this one, the base line. this is where sans and paps are from. axe and crooks on the other hand are from a world that started out at the baseline and changed, headin to a different outcome.”

“So, different circumstances, leading to you being the same, but different,” you say, looking at Axe.

“if ya even think about comparing the two of us,” he warns, and you shake your head.

“No, your circumstances are quite a bit different than mine,” you say, “you’re still a monster, while I’m no longer human, and haven’t been for quite some time.”

“I HATE TO INTERRUPT THIS REALLY DEEP CONVERSATION EVERYONE SEEMS TO BE HAVING IN HERE,” Papyrus announces, as he walks into the living room carrying even more treats and snacks with him, some of which even have a distinct Halloween theme, “BUT THIS IS SUPPOSED TO BE A PARTY. A PARTY WHOSE DISTINCT PURPOSE IS FOR US TO DRINK AND GET TO KNOW EACH OTHER MORE, IS IT NOT?”

“sounds good to me, pap,” Stretch says, “conversation was gettin a little heavy for my taste.”

“thought you fell asleep, ashtray,” Axe quips, and Stretch makes a point of yawning from where he was leaned back on the couch.

“almost. had to zone out, and got bored as a result,” he says.

“Hang on, Papyrus, can you turn around so I can get a look at your costume,” you say, interrupting any further back and forth between the two, and he gladly stands up straight and turns around so you can see what you’re looking at.

He’s dressed as a pirate. And you don’t mean one of those pirate costumes from out of a bag, either, since you don’t quite recognize the design. He actually piece-mealed a respectable pirate costume together, and it looks good.

“NYEH HEH HEH, WHAT DO YOU THINK, Y/N?” He asks, “ONCE WE CAME TO THE SURFACE AND I LEARNED WHAT THE SKULLS ON SOME HUMAN FLAGS ACTUALLY MEANT, I KNEW I WANTED TO ACTUALLY DRESS AS ONE OF YOUR HUMAN PIRATES THE NEXT TIME I EVER WENT TO A COSTUME PARTY. EVEN THOUGH, YOU KNOW, I KNOW THAT YOU’RE NOT ACTUALLY HUMAN, IT STILL COUNTS!”

“That it does, Papyrus,” you say, “though, did you really cook in that?”

“OF COURSE!” He announces, “THE GREAT PAPYRUS IS A SKELETON OF MANY TALENTS. NOT LEAST OF WHICH IS THE ABILITY TO COOK WITHOUT GETTING ANYTHING ON MY CLOTHES. EVEN BACK WHEN I USED TO DESTROY THE KITCHEN WHEN I COOKED, I COULD ALWAYS PRIDE MYSELF ON THE CLEANLINESS OF WHATEVER I WAS WEARING.”

“That’s uh… you used to destroy the kitchen?”

“WELL UH, IT WASN’T MY KITCHEN, EXACTLY,” Papyrus says, and you can see him glance between Axe and you, Axe’s grin growing slightly more manic. Almost as if he’s daring Papyrus to continue that train of thought.

“Anyway, on another topic, do you know how close everyone is to being ready?” You ask.

“OH! BLACK AND MUTT WERE GETTING THEIR COSTUMES ON. SERIF AND TANGO HAD SOMETHING TO DO IN TOWN TODAY, I HAVEN’T SEEN RED, AND EDGE, LIKE ME, ALREADY GOT HIS COSTUME ON BEFORE HELPING ME IN THE KITCHEN,” Papyrus says, “I THINK MY BROTHER SAID HE HAD SOMETHING TO CHECK ON BEFORE HE GOT HIS COSTUME ON. HOPEFULLY, HE DOES BETTER THAN AXE.”

“what? don’t like my human costume?” Axe asks, amusement clearly showing on his face when Papyrus gives him an unimpressed expression.

“Human costume, huh?” You start, drumming your fingers against your leg, “hang on, I have an idea. There’s something missing from your human costume.” You get up, prompting both G and Stretch to make surprised noises from their spots on the couch, as you head for the stairs down to the basement.

Once you make it in your room, you throw open your closet and dig around in one of the boxes down at the bottom that you’ve still yet to empty out, smiling to yourself as you pull out what you were looking for and finding that it was still in relatively good condition, despite being shoved in a box for several years.

Heading back upstairs, you barely notice as you move past Red, too focused on your idea as you walk up to Axe, eyeing you warily from the arm chair he’d claimed. Without showing him what you grabbed, you reach up and plop it onto his skull, making him jump slightly as you adjust and straighten it out.

It doesn’t quite fit, and looks slightly misshapen where it dips into the hole in his skull, but he said he was wearing a human costume, so you put him in a chin length blonde wig you bought years ago on a whim.

“There,” you say, “now it’s a human costume. Would probably look better with a beanie where it dips, but still.”

He stares at you blankly for a moment, taking in your self-satisfied expression, before bursting out into genuine laughter, like you just delivered the best possible punchline to a joke he set up.

Who knows, maybe you did.

“kid, you’re something else,” he says, still chuckling slightly, even as you back away from him to go and sit back in your spot on the couch.

Though, your seat seems awfully boney, and it’s chuckling at you.

“movin kinda fast there, sweetheart?” Red asks, “didn even buy me dinner first.”

You make a startled noise as you move to jump off of him, and he chuckles as he moves his arms to hold you in place.

“Red, come on now, that was my seat,” you say, grabbing at his arms to encourage him to let go of you, but he’s having nothing to do with it.

“still is yer seat, sweetheart,” he says, “but now yer sharin wit me.”

“Red, seriously?” You ask, rolling your eyes, “come on, let me up. I wanna see your costume.”

“you’ll get plenty a time ta see it, sweetheart,” Red says, “but i gotta say, ya look good in yers.”

“that’s cause my bro picked it out and he’s got good taste,” Stretch says, “now let her up, jackass.” He kicks slightly at Red, making the skeleton holding onto you grunt, grumbling as he lets go and you can stand up.

“tha fuck ya kick me fer, ashtray?” He grumbles as you turn around so you can actually see him.

“because ya were being an asshole,” Stretch says with a shrug.

Like G, his costume obviously was inspired by the idea of organized crime, but if G is a generic old-time gangster, Red is from the mafia. From the red accents of his pinstripe black suit, to the gold rings that match his artificial fang, everything about his costume screams Italian mafia. You note that he omitted the tie to keep his collar firmly in place, but even then, you have to admit, he cleans up real good.

“what?” He asks, and you realize you’ve been staring. When he notices this, his grin stretches. “like what ya see, sweetheart?” He asks.

“Actually, yes,” you admit, only for his namesake to blossom on his skull, making both G and Stretch chuckle at his predicament.

“teasin’s kinda hard when y/n seems shameless, ain’t it, red?” another voice asks, and you turn around to see Mutt and Black walking into the living room from where they were both changing into their respective costumes.

Mutt seems to freeze when he gets a good look at your costume, and it doesn’t take you long to figure out why. He’s still wearing his collar, like Red, but his normal clothes have been omitted for a torn up shirt and an equally shredded pair of pants, leaving his scarred bones on near full display. But it also leaves room for what you’re assuming are a pair of gloves and either boots or slippers that go up to his elbows and knees respectively, covered in a dark brown faux fur, though somehow it doesn’t look tacky on him. There’s even a matching wolf tail sewn to his pants.

If you’re Red Riding Hood, than Mutt’s as close to the Big Bad Wolf that you’re going to get.

In comparison, his brother’s Zorro costume seems startlingly normal, though you have to admit, he pulls off the mask hat and cloak surprisingly well.

“Please tell me Blue didn’t coordinate our costumes,” you say, and Mutt chuckles at that.

“m’lord chose my costume,” he says, and you turn your attention to Black. Is there a hint of icey blue under his mask?

What is with these skeletons today?

“WHATEVER YOU ARE THINKING, VAMPIRE, STOP IT,” Black declares, “MY IDEA FOR MUTT’S COSTUME WAS JUST A WEREWOLF!”

“Well, I will say, he pulls it off,” you say, and Mutt’s grin grows just a bit.

“m’lord has good taste,” he says.

“Clearly. Though part of me thinks he just chose it because you go by Mutt,” you say, and he just chuckles.

“gonna have ta get ta know us better if ya wanna know fer sure, ain’t ya,” he says, throwing your own words back at you.

“VAMPIRE, MUTT, GET OUT OF THE WAY SO I CAN PUT THE REST OF THE SNACKS ON THE COFFEE TABLE,” a voice commands, and you move to the side, allowing Edge to do just that. When he stands back up, he moves to the side and smirks as you get a good look at his costume.

He has that same red scarf you’ve seen on him before, but it’s tucked into a Victorian-era style outfit, a long cape draped over his shoulders and pinned in place with a broach, the high collar framing his skull. His typical red boots were traded out for a black pair, still sporting the three-inch heels. You’re pretty sure that’s just a personal fashion choice.

The edgelord is dressed as a vampire.

“What, you hear about skeletons being seen as the walking dead, so you decide to dress as a literal corpse?” You tease, “though, it looks good on you, Edgelord. There’s something striking about the thought of a skeletal vampire.”

“OF COURSE IT LOOKS GOOD ON ME,” Edge declares, “AND DON’T THINK THE IRONY IS LOST ON ME, VAMPIRE. IT AMUSES ME.”

“Edge is easily amused by irony, got it,” you say, and his smirk drops slightly.

“THAT IS NOT WHAT I SAID AT ALL!” He declares, though he quickly seems to notice your grin, “YOU WERE TRYING TO GET A RISE OUT OF ME. AGAIN. DO YOU ENJOY THE REACTIONS YOU GET OUT OF ME, VAMPIRE?”

“You know it, Edgelord,” you say. He’s about to say something else, when the front door opens.

“I HOPE YOU HAVEN’T STARTED THE PARTY WITHOUT US,” Tango declares as he walks into the room, Serif following close behind him. You can see the smaller brother’s eyelights on you, the nervous stance despite his air of forced relaxation, the obvious strain in his grin. It’s clear he doesn’t want to be a part of this, but has joined in to make his brother happy.

“WE JUST GOT THE SNACKS ALL SET OUT,” Crooks says, smiling happily when he spots Tango, “WE HAVEN’T QUITE STARTED YET AT ALL, WE WERE WAITING FOR YOU.”

Tango looks a little startled to see Crooks, but that smile returns as quick as it left his face. You didn’t think anyone else caught it, but from the expression you catch on Axe when you glance back at him, he clearly had.

“WELL, I’M GLAD WE’RE NOT LATE,” Tango says, “I HAD TO TAKE MY BROTHER TO PICK OUT A COSTUME, SINCE HE’D ACTUALLY YET TO FIND ONE FOR HIMSELF, SO IT TOOK US A LITTLE LONGER TO GET BACK FROM THE STUDIO THAN I HAD ANTICIPATED.”

The brothers walk towards the rest of the group, and you’re able to get a good look at what they’re both wearing. Tango, it appears, had settled for the dread pirate Roberts, the loose lacing on his shirt allowing some of his bone structure to peak through, showing that he’s not just slimmer than his counterparts, but his bones appear more delicate than you’d expect from a skeleton. Certainly when compared with Mutt’s.  
  
Turning your attention to his brother, you see that Serif was dressed as Robin Hood. Likely, it had been a compromise between Serif and his brother to allow him to keep a hood, which was over his skull, something you’ve noticed he seems to do a lot.

“EDGE! PAPYRUS! CAN YOU HELP ME WITH THE DRINKS?” Blue calls from the kitchen. With a confirming call from Papyrus, the two walk to the kitchen, and the trio emerge a few moments later, a variety of bottles between them.

“Think you guys got enough booze?” You tease as they emerge.

“I COULDN’T PICK WHAT I WANTED, SO WE COMPROMISED AND GOT ALL OF THESE,” Blue says.

“I think you mean you just wanted an excuse to buy as much as possible,” you say, and Blue’s grin just widens.

“so, you have plans, or was this just gonna be one of those awkward stand around and talk kind of parties?” Axe asks.

“WE WERE GONNA PLAY A DRINKING GAME! RIGHT, Y/N?” Blue asks, looking up at you.

“That was the idea,” you say, “ideally with music or a movie playing in the background.”

“way ahead of ya, hun,” Stretch says. He pulls a remote out of somewhere, you’re guessing the couch itself, and points it to the TV. A couple of button presses later, and you’re presently surprised when “A Nightmare Before Christmas” starts playing. “thought it was thematic,” he explains.

“PAPY! IT HAS CHRISTMAS IN THE TITLE. THAT MEANS YOU SHOULD WAIT TO PLAY IT TILL GYFTMAS TIME,” Blue chastises.

“It works for both holidays, Blue,” you say, “alright, everyone take a seat,” you say, wedging your way between Red and Stretch on the couch. If he was going to steal your seat, then you were just gonna have to sit in the obvious free spot next to him, weren’t you? He was just gonna have to deal with you not cooperating with what he was obviously going after when he stole it in the first place.

After you sat down, everyone else found a chair to sit in, some even dragging chairs out of the dining room, until everyone was in a makeshift circle.

“heh, trying to start without me?” Sans asks, emerging from the hallway. You almost have to do a double take when you notice the costume he’d settled on, his grin reaching shit-eating levels when he sees your expression. Rather than wearing a proper costume, he’d decided to dress in a skeleton bear onesie. Nobody else even reacts much more than Papyrus giving what you’re sure is a purposefully dramatic sigh as Sans sits down in a chair that had been pulled up next to him.

“so, what game are we going to be playing to justify getting everyone all dressed up and in one room?” Axe presses.

“I THINK THE VAMPIRE SHOULD DECIDE,” Edge declares. You notice he has his arms crossed over his chest, and his leg crossed over the other one as he observes everyone else.

“Which vampire, Edge?” You ask with feigned innocence in your voice, “I count two here.”

“YOU KNOW EXACTLY WHO I’M TALKING ABOUT,” Edge says, his eyelights snapping over to you.

“Alright, alright, sheesh,” you say, “don’t get your panties in a twist. Let’s see, howabout two truths and a lie?”

“how would we turn that into a drinking game?” Stretch asks.

“So, the idea is, when it’s your turn, you tell two truths and a lie. If nobody guesses your lie, you don’t have to drink. If someone guesses it, you take a drink of whatever you have. Let’s go counter clockwise,” you move your hand in the air, making a circular motion with your fingers to show what direction you’re talking about.

“so that’s how ya plan on getin ta know everyone,” G says with a chuckle, “clever.”

“HOW WILL SHE KNOW WHAT’S A LIE AND WHAT’S NOT?” Black asks, “THERE’S A FAULT IN THAT PLAN.”

“I’ll know if someone else gets the lie,” you say, “everyone has to participate, or else it’s not a very fun game, see?”

“I GET IT! SO THE MORE DRUNK WE GET, THE MORE LIKELY WE’LL TELL SOME SORT OF EMBARRASSING SECRETS, OR REALLY UNCONVINCING LIES,” Blue says, and his eyelights seem to sparkle as they turn into those large stars you’ve seen before, “THIS COULD BE A FUN GAME.”

“Well, if you tell an embarrassing secret, that’s all on you, Blue,” you say, reaching forward to take a look at the drinks, “so, what all here’s good?”

You grab a blue one that seems to almost sparkle in the bottle, the label just reading “Echo” when you look at it.

“that one’s good mixed with monster cola,” G says, reaching forward to take the bottle out of you hand, his position forcing Red to lean uncomfortably into the couch or risk awkward contact with the other skeleton, “wanna try it?”

“Actually, yeah,” you say, and he takes the bottle from you as he stands up, mixing you a drink as he pours his own from a bottle of scotch you’d actually managed to overlook. Red breathes a sigh of relief when he’s allowed to sit normally again.

“maybe next time you’ll think before stealing someone’s seat, red,” G teases, handing the other skeleton a beer, before handing you your drink. Red mumbles something that doesn’t sound like words, other than the occasional “fuck” as G sits back on the seat of the couch.

Everyone else grabs their drinks of choice, and you notice a few pairs of eyelights focusing on you.

“i think y/n should start,” Serif says, “since the game was her idea and all.”

“That’s fair,” you say, wracking your brain for two truths and a convincing lie to tell these guys. “Alright, two truths and a lie. I sleep in a specially made coffin, I spend most of my free time lately in the library downstairs, and I can’t stand the smell of coffee.”

“WELL, THE COFFIN’S AN OBVIOUS ONE,” Blue says, “YOU’VE SLEPT IN THERE SINCE YOU FIRST MOVED IN WITH US.”

“i can vouch for the library bit,” G says, “so that means ya love the smell of coffee.”

“That was an easy one. I mean, who doesn’t love the smell of coffee?” you say, taking a sip of the drink G had given you. It’s sweet, but not overly so, and there’s a cooling tingle that seems to spread into your body. “Not bad,” you say, “alright. Red’s turn. Two truths and a lie, buddy.”

“hold on, ya sleep in a coffin?” Axe asks, that single eyelight of his focused on you in an intense gaze, as if he’s trying to figure you out.

“I’m a vampire,” you say, “it helps me rest better. Like I said though, it’s a specially made corpse box. It has a bed in it.” Sans chuckles slightly as you sort of reuse the joke you’d once told him, and you prod Red in the ribs with an elbow, “your turn.”

“ain’t gonna be as easy as yers, sweetheart,” he says with a chuckle, “aight, les see. can’t stand kids, used ta be a glorified delivery boy, and i ain’t smoked a joint in over a year.”

“you were alright with kids, last i saw,” Sans says, and you arch a brow at Red. He just chuckles at your expression.

“YOU KNOW THE CORRECT TERM FOR YOUR OLD POSITION, BROTHER, USE IT,” Edge says, before his expression softens minutely, “ALSO, IF THAT IS THE TRUTH…”

“Hold on, correct term, did you seriously used to be a courier?” You ask, and he chuckles.

“sentry, actually,” he says, “back when me an boss were still underground. my post was tha furthest out, an i used ta pick up reports from tha other posts on my way back ta tha house an give em ta boss.”

“Hence the glorified delivery boy thing,” you say, “now what’s this about you and kids Sans was talking about?”

“serif, red and i set up this installation at the school tori founded when we came to the surface,” Sans starts, “some of the human kids flocked to us since, you know, we’re different. serif and i were working on getting it running, leaving red with the kids.”

“You don’t seem too terribly put off by the memory,” you say, and his grin just stretches, “you love kids, don’t you?”

“some a em ‘re aight,” he says, “ain’t after one a my own, but i ain’t opposed ta watchin one every now an then.”

“WHICH MEANS YOU HAVE BEEN PRACTICING SOBRIETY,” Edge says, “CONGRATULATIONS, BROTHER.”

“don go getting all mushy on me, boss,” Red says, blushing slightly at his brother’s praise.

“Was it a problem or something?” You ask

“NOT AS BAD AS IT WAS WITH THE ASHTRAY,” Edge says, and Stretch just chuckles, clearly having no problem with the fact that Edge had just outed his own former drug problem, “HOWEVER THE MONSTER EQUIVALENT TO HUMAN WEED CAN ACT AS A DEPRESSANT. SOMETHING MY BROTHER KNOWS WELL.”

“Hang on, you seemed surprised. How did you not know your own brother’s been practicing sobriety?” You ask, and you swear Edge manages to actually look ashamed briefly.

“got good at hidin it,” Red says, sparing his brother from having to explain, “don’t smell like shit like yer human weed, an i used ta hide it, only smoking shit when i knew boss was gonna be outa town fer a while. would have im thinkin i was off a it, only fer him ta come home an catch me cause i fucked up tha timin.”

“as thrillin as it is to hear red talk about his drug problems,” G starts, “i think ya need to drink so the game can keep goin.”

“then ya better have some damn good ones fer yer turn, double,” Red says, taking a swig of his beer.

“i might,” G says, his fingertips tapping against his glass as he thinks, “alright, here’s mine. i’m too curious for my own good, i once had an interestin run-in with a human that thought i was some sort of cartoon character, and i’ve been arrested before for a misunderstandin since comin to the surface.”

“Ok, I can confirm the part about you being too curious for your own good,” you say, and he just smirks at you, “but the other two are… interesting, and a little farfetched.”

“INDEED,” Edge says, his arms crossed, “ANY MONSTER ARRESTED OVER ANYTHING, MISUNDERSTANDING OR NOT, WOULD BE IN FOR A ROUGH TIME. HUMANS TEND NOT TO BE… UNDERSTANDING.”

“and this is news?” Axe says, and Edge glares at him.

“Not every human, but,” you sigh, “yeah, I know that tends to be true. Has been for a long time. So, G, assuming your lie was being arrested, what cartoon character were you mixed up for?”

“who do ya think?” G asks, pointing at the TV with his thumb, showing Jack Skellington on the screen, and you grin dumbly again.

“You’re kidding? Maybe you have the skull shape and general expressiveness, but really? You don’t even have the right body type. Or height. Tango’s closer,” you say, and he just chuckles.

“HMM, I MAY BE CLOSER IN GENERAL BODY TYPE AND HEIGHT,” Tango says, “BUT REALLY, NONE OF US ACTUALLY RESEMBLE HIM.” As he speaks, you see him studying the screen, “SO, IS THIS HOW HUMANS SEE SKELETONS?”

“Not quite,” you say, “this is a Tim Burton movie, one of his early works. He has a love for making undead lead or supporting rolls, and the general good guys of his stories, but most skeletons in media are… not friendly. Same’s true for monsters as a whole, really.”

“REALLY?” Tango asks, looking back at you.

“Vampires too, trust me,” you say, “though there are things out there where monsters would be the good guys, too. Usually, the antagonist in anything tends to be human, and all out, the evil kingdom is monsters stuff, that tends to be rare and the stories are rarely thought out.”

“BUT WHAT ABOUT SKELETONS, Y/N?” Blue asks.

“Okay, so skeletons usually tend to be portrayed in video games or animated films or cartoon series,” you say, “I know in games, they tend to be a quicker, smarter form of undead enemy, usually found in ancient tombs. Depending on the game lore, either a demon crosses into the physical world and possesses a long dead body not realizing it isn’t alive, or a spirit can reinhabit its own body from when they were alive and seek vengeance on occasion, or, the most likely cause is they’re puppets for a necromancer manipulating them with his own magic. The bones themselves aren’t the dangerous part, the magic manipulating them is. Again though, that’s a human pulling the strings.”

“so how are your kind portrayed?” Serif asks, watching you from under his hood.

“Either blood starved crazies attacking randos in alleyways, or high and mighty noblemen and women seeking to enslave all of humanity as their own personal blood slaves,” you say, “not actually too far off the mark for how we used to be a few centuries back.”

“so which were you?” Serif asks, and you can feel thirteen pairs of eyes on you.

“I’m not that old,” you say, “the days of vampiric nobility feeding off and killing their human staff were long gone by the time I came around. Either hunted off by human vampire hunters, or other vampires themselves who were sick of the tyranny of the few.”

“so there aren’t any vampires like that running around now, hun?” Stretch asks.

“If there are, they’re damn good at hiding,” you say, “anyway, G, drink up pall.”

G just chuckles at that, taking a drink of his scotch, before eyes all turn to Papyrus, who seems almost excited for his turn.

“WAIT! PAPYRUS, BEFORE YOU GO, I HAVE AN IDEA FOR A NEW RULE!” Blue announces, practically vibrating in his seat.

“OH? AND WHAT IS IT, BLUE?” Papyrus asks, turning his attention to the bouncing skeleton.

“WELL, I THINK IT’S CLEAR THAT THE PERSON WHO KNOWS EVERYBODY IN THIS HOUSE BEST IS THEIR OWN BROTHERS,” Blue says, “SO FROM NOW ON, WHEN IT’S YOUR TURN, YOUR BROTHER CAN’T HELP GUESS THE LIE, OTHERWISE IT’D BE UNFAIR AND NOBODY WOULD WIN!”

“Guess that makes the two of us the wildcards in this arrangement, huh G?” You ask, and the scarred skeleton just cocks a brow at you, “well, I certainly don’t have a brother, and if you have one, I sure haven’t met him.”

“nope, can’t say i do,” G says, “heh, guess we are the wildcards.”

“works for me, bro,” Stretch says.

“BUT DIDN’T HEALTHY EDGEY ME ALREADY HELP WITH RED’S TRUTHS AND LIE?” Crooks asks.

“YES, BUT THAT WAS BEFORE THE RULE WAS MADE,” Blue says, “SO IT’S ALLOWED, BUT NO MORE.”

“ain’t even really like boss was tryin ta help, bud,” Red says, “he jus don like it when i tell it how it is wit my old job.”

“YOUR JOB WAS MUCH MORE IMPORTANT THAN A MERE DELIVERY BOY, SANS,” Edge says, and despite knowing everyone’s identities, it’s still a little odd to hear anyone but the monster you met as Sans being referred to as such, “YOU WERE ON WATCH FOR ANY POTENTIAL HUMAN WHO FELL INTO THE UNDERGROUND AND MADE IT OUT OF THE RUINS IN ONE PIECE, AND YOU KNOW THAT.”

“yeah? an how many fuckin humans fell, huh, boss,” Red says, taking a swig of his beer and disregarding the rules of the game, “mos borin fuckin job in tha underground.”

“AREN’T WE GOING TO ADDRESS THE FACT THAT EDGE JUST REFERRED TO HIS BROTHER AS SANS?” Tango asks, looking around at the others.

“don matter,” Mutt says from where he’s relaxed in a backwards-straddled chair he’d dragged out of the kitchen, “y/n already knows we’re all either a sans er a pap thanks ta axe ‘n his lack a costume.”

“REALLY?” Tango asks, looking at you.

“Yup,” you say, “and nobody here tried to deny it or call me crazy. Besides, did you miss what Crooks called Edge?”

“hate to break it to ya, pal,” Axe starts, “but i think your little ice-breaker game is kind of falling apart at the seams here.”

“BUT I DIDN’T GET A TURN YET!” Blue says, pouting slightly from his seat near Stretch. Poor guy would only have gotten his turn if the game really did last at least a whole round, you realize.

“Yeah, okay, it kinda devolved, huh?” you say, “so what kind of activities do you normally do when you all get together and drink like this?”

“depends on the occasion, kid,” Sans says.

“OH! I KNOW SOMETHING FUN WE CAN DO! AND IT’LL GET EVEN MORE FUN THE DRUNKER WE GET!” Blue declares, bouncing up off his seat, his disappointment at the game already seeming to dissolve practically gone as he starts up his newest mission. At first you’re confused, but you get the idea when a song selection screen pops up on the television instead of the stop motion cartoon.

“yes, because a room full of drunken idiots trying to sing sounds like my idea of a good time,” Serif snarks, but you think you can see his grin soften and turn slightly more genuine under his hood.

“I think it sounds like a great time, Berry Blue,” you say, and Blue turns to you with sparkles in his eyes.

“HRMPH,” Black snorts from his seat, “YOU ONLY SAY THAT, BECAUSE WITHOUT THE MUTT’S HELP, THERE’S NO WAY ANY OF YOU WOULD HAVE GUESSED MY LIE.”

“PLEASE,” Edge retorts, “WITH AS MUCH AS YOU BOAST, IT’S AMAZING THE TRUTH EVER COMES OUT OF YOUR MOUTH. WE’RE ALL EXPERTS AT DISCERNING YOUR LIES BY NOW.”

“Less arguing, more drinking,” you urge, “karaoke’s only fun when you’re thoroughly sloshed.”

“i wanna know how you know so many human activities in the first place, kid,” Sans says, and you shrug.

“Lived in the city for years,” you say, “got used to fitting in, making friends, usually only for one night. Been to my fair share of karaoke parties.”

“WE’RE GOING TO BE FRIENDS FOR A LOT LONGER THAN ONE NIGHT, RIGHT Y/N?” Blue asks from where he was was trying to pick the perfect song.

“That’s the plan, Blue,” you say, and he practically beams at you. You can see Sans watching you, as if thinking back on what you’d mentioned earlier, about how you thought all this would only be temporary. You’d have to talk with him about that. Later. For now, you want to see how many skeletons you can get in on drunken singing.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> more multi-skeleton interaction goodness, this is always fun to write. I am almost as easily amused by their dynamic as Edge is by irony.
> 
> Also, sorry for anyone who wanted them all to get a turn at the game, I never intended for it to last. And I didn't write out an actual karaoke scene because I'm not a big fan of song-fics, sorry


	10. Hangovers and Skeletons

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You feel the vampire equivalent to a hangover, and a few of the guys get to learn how you are the day after you decide to try the "normal" version of drinking
> 
> Luckily, you live with monsters who are more than willing to offer help when you need it.
> 
> Though, what is up with the way Axe reacted after you mentioned Blackberry and Mutt?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry about taking so long to get this chapter out. Once it hit a few weeks, I began to panic, which turned into a slippery slope of panic every time I attempted to write.
> 
> I still wanna get a Gyftmass chapter out, but I'm just going to let things progress in my writing as they progress, including time. Both so I don't stress myself out, and also so it doesn't feel nearly as rushed as the Halloween two-parter.

A sharp knock on the lid of your coffin jerks you out of your sleep, and you’re immediately met by just how sluggish you feel. Just how much did you have to drink last night?

Pushing the coffin open, you’re met by the large, round eye sockets of Blueberry, his bright blue eyelights watching you as you slowly sit up.

“Where’s the fire, Blue?” You ask once you’re fully sat up.

“THERE’S NO FIRE,” he says, watching you as you make your way carefully to a seated up position, “ARE YOU FEELING ALRIGHT, Y/N?”

“No,” you answer honestly, “the only downside to drinking. It dulls my senses and makes me slow and unsteady for a day or so. And I’ll have to go back into town tomorrow.”

“WELL, AS LONG AS YOU DON’T HIDE AWAY IN HERE ALL DAY TODAY,” Blue says, “YOU SAID IT MADE YOU UNSTEADY? DO YOU WANT HELP UP THE STAIRS?”

“I think I might need it,” you say, and he offers you his hand, which you gladly take as he helps you up to your feet. He’s wearing his gloves again, so you can’t feel that warm, alive sensation from his bones, but you feel a slight buzzing, and as you lean on him, you can just barely feel a pulse.

He feels alive to your senses, the invisible lines of magic pulsing with life as his body seems to almost hum, the sound originating from his chest like a heartbeat. You’re fascinated by it, but you’re terrified at the same time as it tugs at your instincts, your throat telling you that you need to drink, and soon, to make up for the poison you willingly put into your own body the night before.

And your curiosity is telling you to try the monster helping to support your weight.

Blue must’ve sensed you freeze up, because he shifts so that he can look at you, those bright eyelights focusing in on your face, his sockets shifting with concern as he studies you.

“Y/N? ARE YOU ALRIGHT?” He asks, and you shake yourself out of your instinct driven stupor.

“Yeah,” you say, “I’m alright, sorry to worry you, Blue. Let’s head upstairs so we don’t make the others worry, alright?”

“OKAY,” Blue says, “BUT IF ANYTHING REALLY IS WRONG, PLEASE DON’T HESITATE TO LET ME KNOW SO I CAN TRY TO FIX IT AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.”

Blue helps you up the stairs, and as soon as you enter the living room, you’re greeted by a rather interesting sight.

Axe and Crooks didn’t go home the night before, it seems. Crooks is currently spread out over the couch in what looks like an attempt to get comfortable despite his height, with both legs hanging off one end, and his arm dangling on the floor, other arm folded over his ribcage.

What really catches your attention, though, is the fact that Crooks seems to have passed out on top of Stretch, who’s sat at one end of the couch, still clad in his Luigi costume, though the fake moustache is nowhere to be seen. Somehow though, even trapped underneath Crooks’ torso, he managed to fall asleep, slumped over the much larger skeleton, with his feet kicked out on the floor in front of him.

Axe, on the other hand, was nowhere to be seen. That is, until Blue leads you to the kitchen, where he actually seems to be… cooking something?

You didn’t know Axe could cook. Huh, the more you know.

“Y/N, ARE YOU GOING TO BE ALRIGHT IF I LEAVE YOU AT THE KITCHEN TABLE?” Blue asks, “I HAVE TO FIGURE OUT HOW TO WAKE PAPY BEFORE I GO TO WORK, OR ELSE HE’LL JUST SLEEP THERE ALL DAY, BUT I DON’T WANT TO DISTURB CROOKS.”

“Yeah, I’ll be fine, Blue,” you say, and your skeletal escort lets you sit down at the table, before rushing off to the living room.

“he ain’t gonna get the ashtray up without wakin up my bro,” Axe says, watching Blue disappear into the living room, before going back to whatever he was frying in his skillet, “it’s amazing paps fell asleep like that as it is.”

“I’m actually surprised the two of you stayed the night last night,” you say, and Axe turns his attention to you for a moment, before going back to his skillet.

“expect a couple of drunks to walk home in the woods in the middle of the night?” He asks.

“You have a point,” you say, “though, to be fair, I think the scariest thing in these woods was passed out drunk.”

That earns you a snort, and in your weakened state, it takes you a minute to think that, maybe, he thought you were referring to him or his brother.

“You know, the jury’s still out on who that actually is,” you say, “though, if we go by diet, instinct and abilities, it’s likely me.”

“is there something wrong with you?” Axe asks, startling a laugh out of you.

“I’m a vampire who prefers being active during the day,” you say, “let me count all the things that are wrong with me. Let’s see, moving the wrong curtain, or stepping outside right now could kill me. I moved away from the city with its convenient access to the one thing I need to stay alive just because my instincts were getting dull, and I live with a bunch of guys I barely know that know exactly what I am, and the easiest way to kill me. I’d say there’s a few things wrong with me.”

“good to know,” Axe says, “but i meant this morning, compared to last night. from the others’ reactions to how you were, i’m guessing that’s your normal, so this is…” he stops talking to shove a large fork full of what you take far too long to identify as an omelet into his mouth.

“This is how I am after drinking what amounts to poison to have a good time,” you say with a huff, leaning against the table, “I just have to give my body a day to get it out of my system, then go into town for a drink tomorrow. Even if everything is screaming at me to do it now.”

“drinkin got you into this mess,” Axe says, “and now you’re sayin ya wanna drink more?”

“Not that kind of drink,” you say, “remember what I said about my diet?”

He goes quiet for a moment, before that single red eyelight of his narrows into a pinprick. He swallows hard as he sets his fork down.

“ya mean ya still…” he seems to not know exactly what to say as he looks at you, but you think you know exactly what this guy has on his mind.

“I don’t kill, if that’s what you’re thinking,” you say, “but yes, I drink blood. I have to. Remember Axe, no matter how human I look, I’m not actually a human being. Not anymore. And I haven’t been for a long time.”

“but ya could eat something like this,” he motions to his omelet, “right?”

“If I wanted,” you say, “and only if it’s monster food, otherwise it’ll just come back up. But it doesn’t do anything for me.”

You’re about to say more, when a startled shout and a thud from the living room catches your attention. You share a look with Axe, who grabs his plate and stands up, hurrying towards the living room, and you decide to try and follow behind, though you’re considerably more unsteady than a vampire has any right to be as you move.

It doesn’t help that every step feels like it takes more effort than anything you’ve done in your non-life.

“Hey Blue, I thought you were going to wake up Stretch, what –,” You stop when you see just what had interrupted your conversation with Axe. The startled shout had been Crooks when Blue tried to wake his brother, the poor guy having fallen to the floor with a thud.

“OH MY GOSH, CROOKS!” Blue rushes to the fallen skeleton’s side, “I DIDN’T MEAN TO STARTLE YOU! I’M SO SORRY! ARE YOU ALRIGHT?”

“YES, I’M… I’M ALRIGHT, LITTLE BLUE SANS,” Crooks says, though it seems he’s mostly unsure just how he wound up on the floor.

“I ONLY MEANT TO WAKE UP PAPY,” Blue says, “I WAS TRYING NOT TO WAKE YOU. YOU LOOKED SO COMFY.”

“WHERE’S LAZY ME?” Crooks asks, looking up to see where Stretch had also been startled awake, waving awkwardly at Crooks. “OH! I’M SO SORRY! I DIDN’T REALIZE I’D BEEN SLEEPING ON YOU! THAT MUST’VE BEEN SO UNCOMFORTABLE.”

“i’m fine, crooks,” Stretch says.

“HE’S RIGHT,” Blue says, “I’VE CAUGHT PAPY SLEEPING IN WORSE POSITIONS. LIKE THE TIME HE’D MANAGED TO SQUEEZE HIMSELF UNDER THE SHELF IN HIS STATION HALF UPSIDE DOWN.”

“still proud of that,” Stretch says with a chuckle.

“Looks like everything is fine, Axe,” you say, catching the attention of the three monsters in the living room.

Crooks stares at you for a moment, before jumping up off the floor with a squeak you didn’t think the big guy was capable of making.

“THERE WAS CERTAINLY NOTHING GOING ON!” Crooks screeches.

Smooth.

“i dunno, bro,” Axe says, his grin growing dangerously, “ya looked pretty floored there for a minute.”

That earns a screech you’d become more accustomed to from the taller set of your housemates.

“SANS! NOW IS HARDLY THE TIME FOR ONE OF YOUR TERRIBLE JOKES!” Crooks shouts at his brother, earning a chuckle from Stretch.

“With the way you passed out, I’m amazed you’re not hungover,” you say.

“I DON’T KNOW ABOUT LAZY ME, BUT I RARELY DRINK ENOUGH TO BE HUNGOVER THE NEXT DAY,” Crooks says. You’re actually astounded how quickly he went from yelling at his brother, to eager to respond to you.

“same, hun,” Stretch says, “it’s red and mutt you’re not gonna see today. maybe g.”

“Library would be lonely without my study buddy,” You say, and that earns you a look from Axe that you barely catch, “hey Blue, wanna help me to the couch?”

“OF COURSE!” Blue says, eagerly heading to your side to help you keep your balance as he leads you to the couch.

“what, that your kind a hangover?” Stretch asks as Blue helps you sit down.

“said she needs a drink,” Axe says. That gruff tone he had in his voice the night before is back as he walks over to one of the arm chairs, before proceeding to down the rest of his breakfast in one large bite.

“WOULD SOMETHING FROM GRILLBY’S HELP HER?” Crooks asks.

“not that kind of drink, bro,” Axe says, and Crooks looks at you for a moment, and you can see the wheels turning in his head.

“I thought we were all over the whole ‘Y/N is a vampire and drinks blood’ thing,” you say.

“OH! UM… YOU MEAN HUMAN BLOOD, DON’T YOU?” Crooks asks, “ANIMAL BLOOD WOULDN’T WORK?”

“Don’t tell me you watched those godaweful movies,” you mutter.

“READ THE BOOKS, ACTUALLY!” Crooks announces, pleased you realized what he was referencing.

“That’s just fiction, Crooks,” you say, “it doesn’t really work that way, as much as I wish it could. Just… can we not talk about it?”

“i thought ya didn’t have a problem talking about what you are?” Axe asks.

“I don’t,” you say, “but it seems to be making you and your brother uncomfortable.”

“we’re not some delicate little flowers,” Axe says.

“I didn’t say you were,” you say.

“Y/N DOESN’T WANT TO TALK ABOUT STUFF THAT MAKES YOU UNCOMFORTABLE BECAUSE SHE’S A NICE PERSON, AXE,” Blue says, before looking up at the clock, “I HAVE TO GET TO WORK. Y/N, CAN I TRUST YOU TO NOT LET PAPY GO BACK TO SLEEP?”

“No promises, Blue,” you say.

“NO, I SUPPOSE NOT,” Blue says, before he heads for the front door. He makes sure you’re ducked under the top of the back of the couch before he opens the door. You don’t even want to sit back up when you hear the door closed.

“you really look like shit, hun,” Stretch says.

“I feel like shit, Stretch,” you say, “this is why I don’t drink often.”

“MAYBE YOU SHOULD AVOID DRINKING AT ALL?” Crooks offers. You shift to look up at him, and see that he’s wringing his hands together in a gesture you’ve seen Papyrus do several times before. Like he thinks that maybe the suggestion offended you.

“It’s fine as long as I stop before things get bad,” you say, “and naturally, as long as I go into town tomorrow, when I have my strength back and can actually drive.”

“WOULD IT BE BETTER IF I DROVE FOR YOU?” Crooks offers, earning an odd look from his brother.

“did ya get your license in the time since the last time ya were over?” Stretch asks, and Crooks looks down, almost ashamed.

“WELL, NO,” he says, “I TRIED, BUT WHEN SANS AND I MADE IT TO THE CITY, I…”

“just keep tryin,” Stretch says, “one step at a time. remember how long it took for red and his bro to trust humans.”

“IT’S NOT THAT I DON’T TRUST HUMANS,” Crooks says, “BECAUSE, IT HAPPENS IN CROWDS OF MONSTERS, TOO. IT’S JUST…”

“You get nervous in crowds?” You ask, and Crooks blinks at you in surprise.

“WELL, YEAH, KINDA,” he says.

“They call that crowd anxiety, Crooks,” you say, forcing yourself to sit up, “it’s a thing that happens, and we happen to live near one of the most populated cities in the state.”

“IT’S JUST,” Crooks sits next to you, “THERE WERE NEVER THAT MANY PEOPLE IN THE UNDERGROUND, EVEN BEFORE…”

“Alright, big guy, how’s your night vision?” You ask, and he looks at you, trying to figure out what you’re talking about.

“WHY DO YOU WANT TO KNOW HOW MY NIGHT VISION IS?” He asks.

“I can’t go out in the day,” you explain, “but depending on how well you see at night, I could possibly teach you how to drive. I don’t have a convertible, and I’ll bet a hard top car would be awkward for you. But I can get one.”

“WHY WOULD YOU GET A CONVERTIBLE JUST TO TEACH ME HOW TO DRIVE?” Crooks asks, “WE JUST MET LAST NIGHT.”

“Well, think about it,” you say, “if you go to the DMV already knowing how to drive, things’ll be easier for you,” you say, “and it gives me an excuse to get a new car. You know, one that’ll fit in with the others in the garage.”

“maybe get tougher tires, too, hun,” Stretch says, and you glare at him, making him chuckle.

“WHAT DO TIRES HAVE TO DO WITH ANYTHING?” Crooks asks, “DO TOUGHER TIRES MAKE DRIVING BETTER?”

“y/n got a flat when she first showed up and had to walk the rest of the way down the driveway,” Stretch says.

“OH, WELL, IN THAT CASE, IT WOULD BE BEST TO GET TOUGHER TIRES,” Crooks says.

“Hey, flat tires happen,” you say, “I just forgot to have a spare with me. Black actually made Mutt change mine the next day.”

“hey, bro,” Axe says, standing up from where he’d been seated, “let’s head home.”

“HUH? BUT WE USUALLY STAY LONGER, SANS,” Crooks says, though he does stand.

“just feel like it’s time to get going,” Axe says. He heads into the kitchen, giving you time to duck under the top of the couch before the front door can open.

“we need to move this couch out of the way of the sunlight,” you mutter, earning a chuckle from Stretch, “hey, care to help me downstairs?”

“what, going to bed?” Stretch asks, and you shake your head as you force yourself to sit back up.

“No,” you say, “was wanting to go to the library, actually. Still reading through my old books.”

“working me to the bone,” he says, “think you’re graceful enough to walk down the stairs?”

“Not really,” you say, “I leaned pretty heavily on your brother to get up here.”

“think we’d both topple over if ya tried that with me,” he says. You make a startled noise when he pulls you flush to his side, an arm around your waist. “alright, hold on to me. deep breaths, and close your eyes,” he says lowly, into your ear, “the first time’s always the roughest.”

You’re about to ask what he’s going on about, bud decide to just give him the benefit of the doubt. You put your arms around his waist and rest your head on his shoulder. Closing your eyes, you force yourself to breath evenly, and that’s when you feel it.

The world disappears from all around you, and you feel as though you’re falling but not, and the next thing you know, your back is against the fabric of your beanbag chair. In the library. In the basement.

“Did…” You let go of Stretch to look around, seeing that you are in fact in the library, G watching you both from his usual spot at the table, “did we just teleport?”

“took a shortcut,” Stretch offers, “doing alright, hun?”

“Yeah,” you say, “just caught off guard, is all.”

“sorry i didn’t warn ya ahead of time,” Stretch says, “thought you already figured out that we had that ability.”

“Can all of you do that?” You ask.

“no, not all of us,” he says.

“axe, sans, red, stretch, mutt and myself,” G pipes up from where he was seated at the table.

“I knew something was up,” you say, “most people can’t sneak past me, but you guys do it a lot.”

“yup,” Stretch says, “and now you know our little secret. i’ll leave the two of you to your research.”

With that, he disappears from where he’d been standing, leaving a wisp of bright orange smoke that vanishes almost as quickly, leaving you to stare at the spot for a few moments.

Maybe a few moments too long.

“y/n,” G calls from next to you, making you jump.

“What, I didn’t fall asleep,” you say.

“i called your name three times,” he says, and you wince guiltily, “there’s something off about you today.”

“Stretch thinks it’s a vampire’s form of a hangover,” you say, and G hums at that.

“need to go to town tonight?” He asks, and you’re reminded of when you first met him. That night in the alley, where he’d caught you hunting.

“Tomorrow night, actually, “you say, “the poison needs to work its way out of my system so I have my strength back. I don’t move too well on my own right now.”

You don’t mention that going to town now would be preferable. The fresh blood would force the poison out sooner, and repair any damage done right then and there. You keep your mouth firmly shut despite feeling your fangs extend. You had been clinging to Stretch, but he was wearing that costume, and it dampened the feeling of his magic, but G was so close, and his torso was covered in nothing but that sleeveless turtleneck.

You caught him following your gaze to the pulse point in his wrist, before forcing yourself to look away.

“y/n, remember how you said you can see the pulse points of magic in us like you do blood on humans?” He asks.

“What are you getting at?” You ask, though you’re sure you already know. He’s going to ask if you were tempted to bite him or the others. He had every right to worry about that.

“i actually have a theory about that,” he says. That… wasn’t what you were expecting to hear.

“Well, I’m all ears now, and not up for going anywhere,” you say, “lay it on me.”

“first, is it just us and humans you notice them on?” He asks, and you’re confused what he means at first, then it hits you.

“I don’t… I don’t notice them on animals, if that’s what you mean,” you say, “why? What are you getting at?”

“you don’t see pulse points on animals, that do have blood,” he says, “but you do see them on monsters that don’t have it.”

“What, are you saying it’s not the blood I need?” You ask, scoffing slightly.

“maybe,” he says, “sounds strange, i know. but my theory is that you’re actually after the living magic. it’s different from monster food in that it comes directly from the soul. in humans, this is mingled in with the blood.”

“Why are you telling me this theory now?” You ask.

“because now’s probably the best time to test it,” he says. It takes you a moment for that to register, but when it does, you stare at him, wide-eyed.

“G, what if it doesn’t work?” You say, “what if I hurt you? What if…”

“what if it does work?” G asks, “do you think anyone in this house would let you suffer if they knew there was another option?”

“I don’t want to hurt you,” You say.

“you’ve said that already,” G says, “what about your human friends that found out what you were?”

“Never let them remember finding out,” you say.

G sighs, and you turn to see him looking at you, an odd intensity in that single golden eyelight of his that makes you squirm.

“well, i do know what you are, y/n,” he says, “and i don’t like seeing you suffer. i don’t think anyone in this house would.”

“You guys haven’t even known me that long,” you say, and he just chuckles at that.

“you underestimate the compassion of monsters,” he says, “it’s a universal trait that even red, mutt and their bros share.” He sighs as he sits back on his heels, “look, i’m not gonna force the issue, y/n,” he says, “but i’m not gonna keep my theory to myself, either. ya know i’m less pushy than blue or pap.”

“What if something goes wrong?” You ask, and his expression softens at that.

“sure, monsters might not be as powerful as humans,” he says, “but without intent, we’re usually just fine.”

“Usually,” You say.

“there’s a few exceptions to the rule,” he says, “but usually only if a monster’s given up, or has otherwise let their guard down.”

You find yourself thinking about the pulse points, and that wonderful warm, alive feeling that your skeletal housemates have despite being made of bone. The fact that being around them triggers your instincts when being around animals doesn’t.

And you know he’s right, that even if he drops the issue, Blue and Papyrus won’t.

“Okay,” you say eventually, “okay, we can try, but if I hurt you, do what you need to to get me off of you, got it?”

“ya won’t hurt me, y/n,” he says.

“We don’t know that, G,” you say, “just… take off your sweater and come here.”

“take off my sweater?” He asks, arching a browridge, “wasn’t aware ya needed me topless for this.”

“It obstructs your neck and that’s the easiest place to bite without causing unnecessary damage,” you say, “at least on humans. You’re the one who wanted to trial and error this, so I’m going with what I already know works.”

“suppose that’s fair,” he says. He makes sure you’re watching him before, with a smug grin, he starts pulling his shoulder up over his head in a form of a strip tease. You can’t help but look as he reveals first his spine, then his ribcage, before he tosses the sweater to the side.

You’d seen Tango and Red with their tops open before, and Mutt’s costume from the night before left next to nothing to the imagination, but this was the first time you’d seen any of them completely without anything obscuring their torso.

“like what ya see?” G asks teasingly when he catches you staring.

“Fascinated by it,” you say bluntly, and his face lights up a bit with his golden magic, dusting his cheekbones with its glow, before he clears his non-existent throat.

“anyway, where’d ya want me, y/n?” He asks.

“Right,” you say, patting your lap, which earns you even more of a golden blush for your effort, “it’d be easiest if you were to come over here. I figured straddling my lap would be better for your knees than kneeling. I need to be able to reach your neck.

“hang on,” he says. You’re confused at first, but then he puts on his jacket. “i know, i know, coverin back up,” he says, walking closer to you, “ya’ve already got me straddling ya, don’t need ya feelin up my bones, too.”

“Are spines and ribs sensitive or something?” You ask.

“kinda,” he says, “so just be careful where you put your hands.”

To your surprise, he does actually straddle your lap without any fuss, though you can tell by the way he’s looking anywhere but at you, that he’s not used to being the one in that position.

“Try to relax,” you say, “you can cling to me if you need to.”

“that’s normally my line,” he says, that teasing tone back in his voice.

You move your hands to his back and grab at his jacket, pulling him till he’s flush to your torso. You can feel his breath hitch when you exhale over his vertebrae.

“I need you to relax, G,” you say.

It takes everything in you to not bite down immediately, just resting your fangs against his cervical vertebrae, but eventually you do feel him relax.

So you sink your fangs into the bone underneath them. They cut through surprisingly easy, and you earn a whimper from the skeleton over you for your troubles. As your fangs retract from the newly made wound in the bone, you’re met with a surprisingly sweet taste. Dragon fruit, some part of your brain helpfully supplies, from you don’t know where.

You do know, however, that rather than push you away at any time, G is actively clinging to you, as if trying to physically pull you closer, even as you feel your strength return to you, proving his theory correct.

Though that train of thought is completely derailed however by a quickly stifled moan right next to your ear.

That couldn’t be further from what you’d been expecting.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Someone just discovered a new kink of theirs~


End file.
